National Hispanic Heritage Month has been celebrated for 39 years on September 17, 2007. Enacted into law on that day in 1968, this Public Law set aside a week to honor our Spanish-speaking citizens. When the 100th Congress enacted a new Public Law, the celebration period increased to 31 days, from September 15, 2008 to October 15.

The initiative for National Hispanic Heritage Month is an acknowledgement of the over 45 million Americans of Hispanic origin. The 31 day observation period honors the Independence Day for many Latin American countries including El Salvador, Costa Rica, Nicaragua, Guatemala, and Honduras which celebrate September 15 as their Independence Day. September 16th is the Independence Day for Mexico, September 18th for Chile, September 21st for Belize and El Dia de la Raza (Columbus Day) is October 12th.

Celebrating and bringing to life this special time for children who have parents of Hispanic decent is important along with exposing our Anglo children to how other cultures celebrate various occasions.

Cooking is a social time in Latin American families, and making these quesadillas is a fun way to get the party started. Quesadillas are Spanish and Southwest in origin. The ones we experience in restaurants here in the United States are fine but are not true depictions of how the real Mexican quesadillas are made. Quesadillas in Mexico can be found outside movie theaters, stadiums, and special events with the most popular quesadilla being made with potatoes, cheese, chorizo, beans, green peppers (rajas) and other ingredients.

Following is a simple recipe for quesadillas that allows you to easily involve your children in their preparation. Cooking is a social time in most Latin American countries, and you can make it a social time with your family too!

Quesadillas Ingredients:

3 six-inch flour tortillas

Vegetable cooking oil

2 cups shredded Colby/Jack mixed cheese

One half cup finely chopped tomato

Cilantro

Directions:

Lightly fry each tortilla in 1 tablespoon vegetable oil until crisp and golden, turning once. Sprinkle with combined cheeses and top with tomato. Put lid on pan and turn heat to low. When cheese is melted, fold tortilla in half. Cut each tortilla into quarters. Garnish with chopped cilantro. Serve warm with salsa if desired.

We read the statistics on obesity among our young children here in the United States. We realize the many benefits derived from learning a second language during our early years. For this next activity we suggest using a song that is from Latin America or a bilingual song that features both Spanish and English during its play.

This activity appeals to kinesthetic, auditory and visual learners as it encourages following the leader, very similar to Simon Says. Use an older child to be the leader, and have him direct the children on what to do to match the song. Depending upon the song you choose, it could be body part wiggling or chicken movements! Watch the young ones delight in their grasp of a new culture with new music and perhaps a new language.

This next activity is a Language activity, and it comes to life as the children create their own bilingual number book. The children will make a book/un libro that helps them learn the Spanish words for the numbers one/uno to ten/diez. Reinforcement is the key to all learning so find a cool bilingual song for kids that introduces these numbers in both languages if you can.

Depending upon the ages of the children you might offer pre-made blank books out of brightly colored construction paper that measure a finished book size of five by seven(a total of six pages stapled or bound together is needed for this activity). If the children are old enough they can participate in the making of the blank book first. You will also need markers, crayons, magazine pictures or newspaper food ad pictures, age appropriate scissors, and glue sticks.

Procedure:

Guide the child in making a cute front and back cover for this bilingual number book. Use examples from books from the library or ones you have purchased over the years. Each page should have the numeral (1), the English word (one), and the Spanish word (uno) for the number you are working on. Assist the child in finding a picture that depicts the number of a

certain item (one banana, two dogs, three pencils and so on). Glue the picture onto the page that corresponds to that number.

The English-language number words in sequence order are one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, and ten while the Spanish language number words in order are uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, seis, siete, ocho, nueve, and diez.

And this last activity is about appreciating the culture of Spanish speaking countries. Children learn about maracas, an instrument from our Hispanic friends. In this activity the children make their own maracas and celebrate to music.

Maracas help celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month and the culture and music of Spanish-speaking countries. Using old cardboard tubes, jelly jars, plastic soda bottles (anything that you can put a lid on and shake!) makes this project inexpensive and fun. Find different materials and different sized containers to create a wide range of musical sounds that will allow the

children to create their own band.

This activity is suitable for toddlers, preschoolers and elementary aged children (with adult supervision). As you make these together put on some upbeat bilingual music or Latin American tunes and party!

Materials needed:

Containers with tops/lids to hold dried beans or rice in. (jelly jars, plastic soda bottles, cardboard tubes with paper glued on as lid)

Dried beans, rice, small shell pasta

Construction paper or white computer paper

Paints, markers, glitter, glue, Spanish/Mexican theme stickers

Procedure:

Allow each child to choose their own maraca container and filler. For soda bottles you can insert a cardboard tube that has been cut and wound tightly to fit into the top of the bottle in order to create a handle. Secure the top to the handle with quality masking tape. Pour approximately twenty dried beans, grains of rice or pasta shells into the container (amount based on size of container and filler chosen). Secure the lid back onto the container. If no lid is available, make one with paper and secure tightly with quality masking tape or transparent packing tape. Wrap paper around the container as desired for decorating purposes.

Some children may simply want to decorate the container with stickers. Encourage the children to customize their maraca with markers, glitter, stickers and imagination. Once complete, have fun singing, dancing and playing with the children to various songs that represent the Hispanic culture and bilingual songs that will introduce the Spanish and English languages to these young children.

Being bilingual is no longer an option, it is a necessity. Celebrating Hispanic Heritage Month with your family or your class allows you to show the children in your life that you value other languages and cultures. Set a good example for an open mind and open heart as we bridge children together from all walks of life.

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www.wearebusybeavers.com CHECK IT OUT!! This simple and catchy song will help children learn about the weather! It’s easy enough for anyone – and FUN! If Bob Dylan and Cher collaborated on Children’s song it might sound like this. (PS – Watch the Penguin in the “It’s windy” verse – hahahaha)
Video Rating: 4 / 5

Body Songs -Kids Cartoon Animation Learn Series. Learn all about the functions of the Human Body from the ‘Human Body’ Kids Animation Learn Series. These simple videos elaborated with pictures and descriptions can make the toughest subjects easier and fun for your kids. Click www.rajshri.com to watch more videos animation videos.
Video Rating: 4 / 5

The Wheels On The Bus Children’s Animation

Sorry about the quality, the video is off a video tape that is 24 years old. One of my all time favorite songs. This song was never on any album, it was an unreleased b-side. Its a cover of a punk song.This band should have been big.
Video Rating: 4 / 5

Don’t count your years. Count the happiness that comes your way.

“A birthday is 1st day of 365 days journey. So, just enjoy the trip around the sun.”

A birthday is always a special feeling. It’s that time of the year when you feel really pampered. It’s an occasion for celebrations when the entire family or friends are here to celebrate together.

When we celebrate someone’s birthday, what we get is a bunch of happy memories and wholesome family fun. Birthday is one those moments when a person’s existence makes you very happy. You wish the person heartfelt wishes coupled with lots of family and friends.

Birthdays in modern times revolve around friends, parties, celebrations, wining and dining and of course fine gifts. It leaves relations with good feelings of nostalgia and memories.

Birthdays have no rules. One can celebrate anyone’s birthday. It could be your grandparents, parents, cousins, siblings, uncles, aunts and so on. You can raise a toast to the person whose birthday it is. A bunch of flowers or a lovely chocolate cake is all that you need to make someone’s birthday special. The other things about the celebration like a huge theme party or a grand dinner is something that can follow depending on the nature of the person whose birthday is being celebrated.

You can celebrate with beautiful messages in any language you want and make the person feel special. Pen down your thoughts and emotions and make your love ones’ birthday special.

Candles have a very big significance in birthdays. They have the significance of counting the years gone by and those coming forth. The candle light also signifies that the life should be brightened up and surrounded with happiness. Blow off the candles and make a wish.

Birthdays are an important way of establishing beautiful relationships that last forever. Many social research surveys show that candles were used for the first time by the Greeks who lit candles and placed them on ceremonial cakes that were dedicated to Goddess Artemis.

This ritual was later incorporated in the Christian celebrations too.

Some of the best birthday candles are made in Germany and German candles are really world-famous. They for most part, decorate the cakes by adding the element of brightness.

Candles are of several types. One can get party candles and even character birthday candles. Party candles are used at carnivals and they usually come in a vast number of shapes and sizes, artwork, colors, etc.

Sometimes there are themed cards that kids prefer like Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, Tom and Jerry and many more.

There are trick birthday cards. The best thing about these trick birthday candles is that when you light them, they re-light themselves. They are a big surprise for adults and kids alike. It’s very amusing and can make for a very good prank on people. It is the magnesium in the wick that re-lights the candles several times.

Birthday cakes have an origin in the Middle Ages when the English would cover up symbolic items such as gold coins, rings and thimbles inside their cakes. Each item was supposed to be connected with a certain prediction. For instance, if a person found gold coins, it implied that the person would become wealthy and if they discovered a thimble, it meant that the person would never marry.

- Alexander Pope

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It’s a five 5 little monkeys jumping on the bed song to the tune of Hush Little Baby. Arranged and performed by AJ Jenkins. Copyright 2010: All rights reserved. For free MP3s, worksheets and much more: www.KidsTV123.com Amazon CD and MP3 sales www.amazon.com

www.erichermanmusic.com Children’s music artist Eric Herman performs and stars in this cartoon video that depicts a day that seems particularly lucky in many ways. (Stay tuned for the stinger after the credits!) This song is from Eric’s Snow Day! CD and was co-written with children’s musician Eric Ode. Eric Herman’s CDs/MP3s are available at the following locations: Eric’s website (CDs and MP3 albums): www.EricHermanMusic.com CDBaby (CDs and MP3 albums): www.cdbaby.com iTunes (MP3 songs and albums): phobos.apple.com Kidzmusic.com (MP3s): www.kidzmusic.com Amazon.com (CDs): www.amazon.com Amazon.com (MP3s): www.amazon.com CDs are also available at www.pokeypup.com and MP3s are also available at all other major digital distribution sites. Eric Herman performs super fun concerts and elementary school assembly programs around the country. Visit http for more information, as well as MP3s and games, and be sure to subscribe to Eric’s channel to be notified when new videos are posted here. If you like this song, please request it on XM Radio by calling 866-328-2345 (ch. 116) and on Sirius by calling 877-337-4748 (ch. 116), or ask your local library if they can carry Eric Herman’s CDs!
Video Rating: 4 / 5

I Like Candy (Counting song) by Patty Shukla off of her children’s music album “Play with Me, Sing Along!” available on iTunes, Amazon.com on through www.pattyshukla.com Track from Patty’s CD “Play with Me, Sing Along”, found on Amazon, iTunes, and most other online music stores. www.amazon.com Patty’s new CD titled “Play with Me, Sing Along” is currently available on Amazon.com atwww.amazon.com Buy this song on Amazon, iTunes, and most other online music stores. www.amazon.com Patty’s new CD titled “Play with Me, Sing Along” is currently available on Amazon.com atwww.amazon.com Available to purchase on: iTunes (all stores) iTunes Video Napster Rhapsody MusicNet Groupie Tunes Lala.com ShockHound Amie Street Thank you for listening!
Video Rating: 5 / 5

Hi there! You can find more children’s songs, music and nursery rhymes by Cullen’s Abc’s at www.youtube.com or you can browse all of Cullen’s free children’s videos over at her You Tube channel. The Twinkle Twinkle Little Star song is a popular English nursery rhyme. Rhymes are central to building children language skills. Like Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, many rhymes and songs are rhythmic and the language is often repetitive, which helps toddlers build their language skills. Using hand and facial actions with music and rhymes help toddlers identify words more easily eg ‘clap your hands’. The best thing about rhymes is that they are free, and can be done anywhere and at anytime!. Remember to sing along with your child!

I was your typical traveling musician back in the 90’s playing rock music up and down the East Coast.  After years of living the rock ‘n’ roll lifestyle, I eventually found myself working a full time office job for extra income.  Articles about my band changed from titles about headlining clubs to titles about being a banker by day and a rocker by night.  Over time, life took some additional twists and turns, and I found myself yearning to be that late night rocker while in reality I had settled down as the parent of three kids.

The question that kept echoing in my mind was, ‘How do I satiate that desire to continue music while dedicating the time and energy necessary to be a good parent?’  The answer to that question ended up being right in front of me in the form of knee high kids running around me daily.  Who could be a better and more dedicated audience than my own kids?

With that in mind, I co-founded Silly Bus, an educational media creations company specializing in fun, educational kids music and videos.  Silly Bus writes songs with Top 40 hit sounding melodies with lyrics and content catered to kids.  With songs like “History Hip Hop” and “Watch Me, I Can Do This!,” Silly Bus helps children feel confident and happy while learning subjects like math, science, fitness and green living.  

I would highly suggest venturing into kids music to any parent musician with that unfulfilled desire to play.  Writing and playing kids music has been extremely gratifying as a musician and father.  I get to write and record songs, and my biggest fans are my own kids.

Rock on, dads!

Lee Brooks has played music professionally for more than 15 years.  Prior to Silly Bus, his live band shared the stage with well known acts including Huey Lewis and the News, Switchfoot, Cyndi Lauper, Sugar Ray, and Vanessa Carlton.  His songs appeared on MTV, Discovery Kids, and a compilation CD that included Dave Matthews.

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Anita Renfroe did a great job with the Mom Song, but how about the kid’s version? What about our complaints, nags and endless eyerolls? Check out our parenting website written by kids radicalparenting.com Here Vanessa Van Petten does her own rendition of the Mom Song with the kid’s version! For more funny spoofs, songs and the kid’s perspective on awesome parenting check out http:onteenstoday.com. We are the only parenting blog written from the teens. Lyrics to the Mom Song Kid’s Response by Vanessa Van Petten I am up, I am up, Im up and dressed Can I wear this, am I cute, are the boys impressed Wheres my clothes and my shoes and my backpack at And, Yes Im wearing that No mom, no OJ, wheres the pop tarts at Wheres my lunch, eww gross, do I look fat? After school bring me a snack when I get back And then its homework until I collapse Watch some TV shows, to us teens its the most important thing of all Get my TIVO for set up for gossip girls—the coolest show of all Please remember not to come downstairs when my friends are over here Just stay upstairs all the time so when we gossip you will not hear TTYL, Not now, Im coming, can you drive me there Close my door, Get out! Please dont touch mess up my hair I said thank you, I dont want to, please dont bother me Theres my cell phone, its a text, Ill have to BRB LOL, cu later, take me to the mall Wait one second I have to take this call. Thats so chill, so cool, oh mom please chillax ROTFL, oh please dad just relax I hear …

Love is a feeling with which no one can stay untouched. It is an emotion full of abysmal bliss and empathy. Had there been no love and compassion in this world, life would have been harsh, dull and devoid of feelings. Music is the soul of the life without which it is simply bereft of rhythm, harmony and melody. Everyone falls in love and everyone loves music. Without the emotion called love music would be incomplete and without the bliss called music, love would be emotionless. Love and music are closely connected.

Since ages lovers have allured each other with the music and love songs that are full of blissful rhythms and great words that convey the different feelings and emotions. There have been innumerable songs and tracks that have touched the heart and souls of the lovers. Be it young or the old, no one can deny that one is soothed and mellowed by the romantic music. The love songs are a perfect way to tell your beloved that she or he is truly special and valuable for you. With the incredibly romantic numbers you can share your innate feelings with your soul mate with sheer style.

There have been many artists and singers who have given some of the most romantic and heart felt songs that are full of intimidating words and emotions. People have admired these songs whole heartedly and they have become the ultimate expression of love and affection. These songs are sung by singers who have mellifluous voices that reach the souls through the ears. You can not stop loving and admiring these songs which seem like divine creations. An unimaginable bliss surrounds you when you listen to these invigorating songs and enthrall in joy.

There are hundreds of love songs that have ruled the charts as well as the hearts of the listeners. The amazing songs simply make you feel exasperated and scintillated. The 101 Love Songs music is an album that gives you the most lovable and adorable love songs which you would simply admire and applaud. They have been written by the finest writers and lyricist and you can feel the magic of the excellent poetry in these songs. The wonderful wordings of the tracks depict the myriad emotion and facets of love. Each track showcases the beauty and integrity of this wonderful benediction with serenity and subtlety. The soft voices and sombre tones fill your heart with great joy. This album is a truly awesome collection of most wonderful tracks by highly celebrated performers. You would love to play the CD 101 Love Songs music.

It has 101 incredible songs that will simply woo you. The track “ When A Man Loves A Woman – Percy Sledge “ is absolutely heart felt and melodious. The song was created after the artist was hurt by a broken relationship and deception by a woman. Another track from the collection is Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head by J.Thomas; this track is a million copies seller from the legendary movie Butch Cassidy And The Sundance Kid. Songs like Love Is All Around by The Troggs, Everlasting Love by Robert Knight and Bye Bye love by The Everly Brothers celebrate the eternal bliss and wonder of love. The DVD 101 Love Songs music has many other tracks that are amazingly mesmerizing.

Romeo and Juliet, Love Story by Lai are the music numbers which the listeners would love to listen over and over again. The compilation of mesmerizing songs is totally awesome and it is certainly one of the best collectibles of all times. The 101 Love Songs Music is an eternal album that will adorn your music collection and give you amazing joy.

The latest 101 Love Songs Music is available at lucrative prices on various outlets. It is a pack of four CDs or DVDs. Each DVD contains soulful numbers that have different emotions and set in different backdrops. Each song is inspired by some interesting and touching situations. You can get amazing deals and offers on this incredible album on various online shopping portals. Just check out different websites to get the best details about the album with track listing, reviews and ratings etc.

The Beatles’ best song
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A Kids’ Song
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A Week in the Life of the Single, Working Mother

“It’s ok,” you think. “Nothing to worry about, really!”  I mean who doesn’t occasionally put their panties on inside out?  It can happen! The cottage is relatively dark in the morning and the bathroom has no light in it, so even if you went to the toilet you wouldn’t have noticed. No problem there. But then you go to the bathroom at work for the umpteenth time in the morning (you suffer from a weak bladder) and only then do you notice, staring back at you from the mirror,  a moron who is wearing two different types of earrings! Not two similar earrings, that may be understandable, but two totally different decorations. “Are those warning bells?” I think, listening intently.  “Or is that just the sound of me losing my mind”. I stride back into the office, laughing – you must do this in these situations -  and tell everyone the story. It’s funny, really, I mean, who doesn’t occasionally put two different earrings in their lobes?

All might have been well if I hadn’t remembered the keys! “Try to forget the key story!” I tell myself.  But no, a nagging imp-like, pest of a voice insists that I remember the keys. So, warily I cast my mind back to this morning’s debacle.  On leaving the cottage this morning, I absolutely know, without a shadow of a doubt, that I looked at the keys on their hook. I removed them from said hook and walked up to my car with three of my four children. Imagine my frustration and absolute impatience (I’m very impatient with ineptitude), when I couldn’t find the keys. This followed having to squeeze into my car (it was parked too close to my brother’s car), loaded with bags, trying to balance on my high heels that kept sinking into the soft earth. The keys! I just could’nt find the blasted things! We all looked, all four of us, while I muttered all the while that I definitely took them off the hook. Jarred, my nineteen year old, decided, very quietly, not to believe me, and wandered off to the cottage. He reappeared shortly after, keys in hand. Had I dropped them on the way? Did I put them down after picking them up? No, nothing that simple. I was flabbergasted to discover that they were still, in fact, hanging on the hook. Those damned fairies. Jarred knew better than to comment.

 My doctor says I’m stressed. My therapist says “Duh”! So, I decided that I would look at a week in my life and try to discover if I am indeed stressed, tired, overworked and hence abnormally distracted!

A week! How do you determine a week? My life seems to run from one chaotic moment to the next, forming hours, days, weeks and years. My absent-mindedness began on a Friday so I decided to capture my week beginning with the previous Sunday.

This week began relatively normally on Sunday evening when my eleven year old realized that he hadn’t completed his project that had been due for the previous Thursday. Nothing too complicated, just a moving greeting card! No need to panic, especially as he also had to look for every letter of the alphabet (in differing fonts and sizes), and stick them onto a piece of paper.  Ok, so I panic a little! Who wouldn’t?  Try finding a “Q” or a “J”. The card is cut out, his cricket players look like aliens and the family is in fits of laughter while my seven year old daughter draws something of a Rembrandt version of his picture (she is very bright). He doesn’t mind, just shrugs and continues to be glued to the TV, while I bellow, “Homework! Vincent, your homework!”

This situation could, in itself, be bearable but for that fact that it is happening at 6.30pm. This is the beginning of hell night. It is bath time accompanied by more bellows, “Get in the bath! Vincent, bath water! Katie, GET IN THE BATH!” It is school lunch time, but more on that later. It is uniform preparation time and goodness knows what else. There is always something of great significance that pops up out of nowhere to cause chaos and disorder.  There is also supper. After a huge lunch of prawns and rice the little angels are hungry. I’m not hungry! So I throw chicken pieces, covered with tinned tomatoes into the oven and put on a pot of rice.  I am functioning on three planes. My friend is there for a visit with biscuits, dips and wine – very sophisticated, my kids are between nakedness and pyjamas – very bohemian, my food is slowly overcooking and I am trying to engineer a moving cricket bat that will hit a ball across a card. As I’m sure I’ve mentioned, there is absolutely no need to panic – much! The kids end up going to bed halfway through the E-TV movie which, of course, is too late! I am a failure of a mother!

By 9.30pm, school uniforms are ready, hanging over chairs but sandwiches must be made. I usually make amazing lunches but tonight there is no bread. If there was bread there would be no filling. I am, however, supermom, and I have a plan! Tuckshop! Godsend! Tomorrow I will make that new sandwich filling : sweet corn, tuna and mayonnaise. The kids are already moaning about that one. I tell them that they have to broaden their horizons! Then I get “make us an extra sandwich, in case we don’t like that one”. My kids, the connoisseurs! Tuna – not good enough.  Ham – only fine alone, no mayonnaise or, for Katie and Jarred, with mustard. Vince wants salami, no mayonnaise. I tried pilchards and cucumber. My little ones tried to be kind saying,  “Mom, we didn’t really like the lunch today”. Jarred said it was wonderful but he that he couldn’t take it to Varsity anymore because : “It STINKS!” How subtle! One day they love chocolate spread, the next they don’t. One of them, can’t remember which, hates cheese spread but my twenty-two year old could live on it.  One loves peanut butter, the other shudders at the thought. The only thing I seem to get spot on are the chocolates and sweets that I provide.  Jarred won’t eat those though! He’s trying to diet!

Monday morning dawns and I have to drag myself out of bed at 6.30 after I’ve changed the alarm setting twice. I realize that I’m playing with fire as Jarred must be at University by eight and we have to drop the little ones off first. He will be furious if he realizes how late we got up. Little ones don uniforms (this takes about half an hour – no idea why), with me shouting about how they should stop dawdling and have breakfast. Needless to say, they suck down their cocoa pops while big brother rants about how late he’s going to be. I decide that I can’t possible make it to work. My neck is in agony, I am exhausted and constipated and signs of haemorrhoids are beginning to emerge.  My boss will spontaneously combust as she has told me that today I am getting a written warning for a mistake made on Friday.  Could my physical symptoms be psychosomatic or am I merely skirting the threshold of severe and irreversible stress? I phone the office, make excuses to my colleague (it’s easier) and go to bed, after telephoning the doctor to make an appointment for my daughter and myself. Katie has been getting waves of extreme tiredness and I’m really worried. It’s never anything curable, when it’s your child, is it? The mind of a mother is a very frightening place sometimes.

Monday wears on. I fetch Katie and her friend from school at 1.00pm. We go home, relax a bit, read and I smoke hubbly bubbly, (it relaxes me, ok!). She has raided my purse because she wants a pie for lunch. I have no money save R40 in the car for petrol! Jarred has my card. Three fifteen p.m. and it’s time to fetch Vincent from cricket (back to the school I left  two hours previously). I give in and buy two pies and put twenty rand petrol into my car. We pick up Vincent, nearly get hit by a stray cricket ball and head off to the doctor for our 4.00pm appointment. The fun has just begun! Kaitlyn must have a blood test. Have you ever tried to hold down a ten foot, rabid, thrashing and peculiarly terrified Anaconda? I’m sure not but I think it would be a breeze!  It would certainly be easier than holding down a terrified, stubborn, bucking bronco of a seven year old. I won’t go into detail – it’s far too traumatic – but it played out like a scene from a Tarantino movie.  Three adults (all in various phases of shock) holding down a tiny child whilst one of the adults sticks a 10cm thick, 1 metre long needle into her arm and  proceeds to suck all the blood from her body. She, all the while, screaming “Mommy! Mommy! Please!”.  I tell you, if you have never felt like a heel before and have an odd desire to do so, I fully recommend this as the way to go about it.

In the midst of the screaming chaos, Jarred phones. “You can fetch me now”, he says nonchalantly. The little pulsing blood vessel in my temple seems to explode as I explain as calmly as possible, why he has to wait. Meanwhile, Vincent has disappeared to the toilet in the front of the doctor’s rooms. He does not emerge until the screaming, from the far end of the building has subsided! Once the torture is over, she is shaken but laughs as I joke about how strong she is and how hard she can kick. She is not the only one trembling. The doctor grins nervously at me saying that he knows it seems barbaric, but honestly, it has to be done. Then he rushes from the room. The nurse just fumbles for words and I sit there hugging my daughter until my heart decides to return to my chest.

It is now five o’clock and Jarred is waiting at the University in Parktown. I rush off, still shaken but trying to play it down and make jokes. Katie sits unusually quietly on the back seat. I hardly notice the hellish traffic, I can handle anything after the past hour. We get to Jarred and he, very foolishly, says : “Why do you make appointments at five when you know you’re fetching me?” Is it really necessary to explain or will my feral death stare suffice. It does! Katie revives and excitedly tells Jarred about her nightmare experience. In record time it becomes an adventure and by Wednesday I will be relieved to know that my baby is doing well and that she probably just has worms.

In the blur that is my life I make supper, get the children bathed, eat, sort out homework, uniforms and sandwiches. The ex-husband telephones the children and says something inane to Katie like : “If you go to bed early you won’t be so tired and need blood tests.” Although I contemplate smashing the cell phone against the wall, I realize that it is mine and so I pour myself another glass of wine! The quiet breathing of my sleeping children, the studious attitude of my middle son, and the comings and goings of my eldest make it all worthwhile – most of the time! Thank God Monday is over.

Tuesday begins much the same way with me pulling my comatose body from the sleeper couch (don’t ask). Today there is a cricket match for Vincent (he finishes at about 5.00), and netball and  P.E. for Katie. I am organized. All is well. The usual shouting routine ensues in a fast-forward blur and I appear, miraculously, at work. I am angry and defensive due to the fact that when my friend called for me at work on Monday, my boss told him that I was scared to come to work. Scared? Of work? I’m waiting for blood test results, if you really want to know what fear is! I am called into the “big boss’s” office. I am given the poor work performance lecture and am prepared to receive my letter of warning. I decide to completely ignore my boss – dislike her right now – pull myself together and try even harder at work.  I am so happy when my friend calls and says that I don’t have to do lift scheme and that Kate can play with “Scarlie” today. A breather!  Jarred, however, finishes early so I have to take him home and come back to work. What is it they say about no rest?

After work I fetch Katie from Scarlet (where she did her homework – whoopee) and Vincent from cricket.  I finally get the kids into the bath while I cook supper in the house (again, don’t ask).  It’s a rather difficult task as I have to keep running back to the cottage for the ingredients that I have forgotten.  I try to do this really quietly because if the bathing darlings hear me, I am yelled for. This usually happens when I’ve made it into the cottage undetected and am halfway back to the house, thinking how cleverly I have eluded them. The word, “MOM”, uttered very loudly, causes me to stop dead in my tracks. Like a secret agent I attempt to melt into my surroundings. I become very quiet, I tip-toe up the stairs and into the kitchen. Made it! They soon forget that they have called me and I am congratulating myself when a raucous cacophony emerges from the bathroom and the air is filled with shouting and wailing.

“Jarred!” I scream, “For goodness sake, sort them out!” 

They are fearful of him until he turns his back and then Katie begins to sob and gesticulate hysterically. It appears that Vincent has ‘accidentally’ wee’d in the bath and then, just as ‘accidentally’, has splashed all the wee-filled water all over her.  All fear of terminal illnesses vacate my mind as I threaten to drown the children in the bath. My yells of “GET OUT! PUT NEW WATER IN,” to Vincent are heard blocks away while Katie adamantly refuses to get back in the bath with him and wanders around sopping wet and wrapped in a towel.

I somehow make it through the evening, tidying my cottage, packing my mom’s dishwasher with my dishes and watching that Vincent completes his homework. All memory of long division has long since been erased and I battle to help him with his maths homework.  I quickly pack Katie’s ballet  clothes – where the hell are those character shoes – and convince her that, because the shoes are too small,  I will get her new ones.

“Feel where my toe is,” she says convincingly to me.

Vincent has P.E tomorrow, so does Katie, but he refuses to wear a Speedo and so I must pack him some long shorts. While I fully applaud his fashion sense, I doubt that the school will believe his excuses for much longer.  I sigh when, miraculously, the atmosphere is infused with the even breathing of sleeping cherubs. I am just relaxing into a wine-induced oblivion (of course I’m exaggerating) when Gary, my eldest grabs on to my security gate from outside shouting, “Mom, Mom, hurry, open up! Quickly! Hurry!” My heart leaps into my throat. Someone is dead? Someone is chasing him? It’s obvious that something truly horrible has happened”.

“What is it? I somehow blurt out.

“Hurry! Open up! It’s Prison Break”.

How I’ve actually made it to Wednesday is beyond me. Perhaps it’s those “happy pills”, maybe the fact that I’m eating better, or more likely, I am simply functioning on auto-pilot.  Things go relatively smoothly this morning. I think I’m used to the chaos and I arrive at work only to realize that I must go shopping to cater for the afternoon meeting.  My boss is subjected to grunts, nods and head shakes from me as I refuse to be civil to her. I do a few things in the office and then head off to the shop to buy the eats. Today is not my lift scheme day and I look forward to a nice quiet lunch with my colleague from my previous job.  It’s really nice and I get back to work relaxed after a glass of wine and a tramezini.  I have a few invitations for the evening (kids are out Wednesday evening with their dad), but I decide to stay home and do my ironing that has been building up for weeks.  I buy myself a bottle of wine, make no supper because I’ve eaten and sit down with a magazine on a chair that I hardly move from for the entire evening. Jarred sits with me doing his homework. I help him because it’s English and I’m not bad at it. When I look for the wine I realize that I left it in my car, which Gary has taken. I sigh! I will have it at 7.30 when he gets home and hubbly will do in the meantime. I make sandwiches at the table and sort out school clothes. Needless to say, I do absolutely no ironing and have a glass of wine at 7.30. I continue to do the Sudoku that I have been doing the whole evening. Vincent and Katie get home at 8.00 and I have to rush them through a bath and then homework.  In bed late again! Jarred then begins to play guitar and make up a song about the politics of the country. I am excited and write down the words. Katie and Vincent listen from their beds.  By bed-time I’ve had about three glass of wine and am sleepy. Uncharacterisically, as I lie down the room begins to spin, and spin, and spin! I end up sick in the bathroom and fall asleep almost immediately.   What an end to my night of semi-solitude. They say, those very wise “they” people, that alcohol affects you more when you’re stressed. I wonder….! It’s a damn good excuse though.

I am pretty sure that I don’t have to mention that the vacating of my bed on Thursday morning is no easy task.  I do, however, succeed! Today we leave with only school bags. No tog bags, no cricket bats, no tackies, no ballet things, no extras at all. I feel free, wild – nothing to forget. The euphoria is intoxicating. This must be Heaven. I am even energized to go grocery shopping this evening. My friend says that she is free this evening. She asks if we should get together. Frankly the idea of wine or any other alcoholic drink, after last night, induces fear and trembling.  I decline.  Work is quiet as I continue to ignore my boss and 2.00 pm brings about my usual lift scheme.   I drop the little ones off, practically begging them to tidy the cottage and go back to work.  I don’t recall this but they say that I told them they could go shopping with me if they tidied up.  At about 4.00pm Jarred arrives at the office and I take him home. I have since decided that I should shop alone, leaving the little ones at home with Jarred to bath and do homework. The outcry that results from this suggestion to Vin and Kate is something I am not qualified to deal with.  I deflate and collapse into my car seat and meekly say, “get in”. They inform me that they “even cleaned the cottage”, in order to be able to go.

Shopping to me is a sadistic ritual.  I cannot comprehend those perverse individuals who actually enjoy the dreaded ordeal.  Add on two children who want everything in sight and who, after pleading to accompany me, want to go home after half an hour. Include fist-fights, sibling verbal abuse and disappearances every five minutes for free samples, and the whole thing intensifies ten-fold. I arrive at the shop at about 5.00 pm and get home by 7.30.  I am comforted by a well-meaning woman who tells me that my two fighting little maniacs are completely normal.  This is after she hears me yelling hysterically at them to “STOP IT!” and “I TOLD YOU TO STAY AT HOME”, accompanied by several other expletives. I tell her that I’ve had to go through it twice, having two older sons as well, and that I must have done something particularly evil in a previous incarnation.  She tells me that I look too young to have two older sons and I almost kiss her.  I feel haggard and worn, but decide to preserve the tiny morsel of dignity that I have left.  

I arrive home in the dark with two tired children who have not as yet bathed or, horror of horrors, done homework. Supper is no problem. MacDonalds, I love you! The cottage is in a dismal condition and if they had indeed tidied it up, a hurricane has since swept through it.  I try to tidy while Jarred brings a few shopping bags from the car. We eat and Katie takes ages to finish her food while I jump around uneasily trying not to think of bathing and homework.  Vincent gets stomach ache and needs the toilet but can’t find matches for the candle that has replaced the broken light bulb.  He eventually decides he has to go in the dark but five minutes later is wandering around bare-bummed looking for a torch! Jarred is ranting about how unfair it is because no-one will help him unpack the car and I am cleaning, packing away groceries and emptying the garbage bin, while yelling at Vincent to get back into the pitch black bathroom and onto the toilet. Katie, meanwhile continues to eat at two chews per minute and Xena, my Doberman, runs in and eats Vincent’s burger! Thank goodness Katie has two burgers, having got the special in case Gary is home for supper.  This extra one is given to Vincent. When I remind my daughter that she is taking an abnormally long time to eat she throws down her burger saying, “Fine, I will starve”. This results in me telling her what a “princess” she is!

Add to this chaotic evening the fact that there is a really young and persistent man that I know who keeps phoning me at the most inconvenient times and you have the makings of a true farce. I kid you not, to the delight and bemusement of my children he phoned and let it ring for a full seven minutes. They, and I, were absolutely amazed. My little ones know all the excuses in the book now when he calls, but this time we just let it ring – our amusement for the evening.

Eventually, eventually, eventually clean, educated and well-fed children are lying in their beds.  Unfortunately there is some good stuff on T.V. and the little darlings keep peeking at the screen. Death stare time! Eyes shut! And peace reigns supreme.

Friday, FRIday, FriDAY! Happy days! It’s Friday!!!! I have made it. We have made it. We are breathing and relatively sane. One more day to get through. Should be a breeze. And all appears to be fine but looks can be deceiving. I am organized! I am Supermom! Katie’s ballet clothes are ready, lunches are packed into cases and it’s time to go. But dizzyingly quickly we return to the Friday day I lost my mind!  The keys, the panties, the earrings – all effects lasting temporarily however.  My initial horror gives way to amazement as I realize that my distractedness appears to have come along with a burst of genius. I have managed, quite extraordinarily, to work out how to put seven separate documents onto one document on Excel. This involves a lot of copying, pasting, (making small), renaming and finally coming out with a whole new document. I am so impressed with myself that I forget to sulk and run to my boss to tell her how wonderful I am.  She agrees that I am very clever and I see no reason to continue the argument.

After the initial shock of all my weird activities of the morning, I begin to feel relatively relaxed.  Katie has ballet and so does her friend, so the other half of the lift scheme does the lifts today.  I do, however, still have to take Jarred home. This changes when he telephones to say that the pub at Education Campus is opening today and he will come over later, probably around three. This all seems fine until my boss, whom I have just made friends with, decides that we can go home early – at three. I try to call Jarred. Surprise, surprise – his phone is off. I have to wait. I can’t very well go storming into the pub to yank him out. In the meantime his older brother calls. I must meet him at home and then take him to Vodacom to sign for his new SIM card. The problem is we must do this by 5.00 as the shop will probably close. The other problem is that I have no idea what time Jarred will put in an appearance.  Gary laughs hysterically when he hears the situation, telling me that I’ve got a long wait ahead of me. I little while later the little ones call me at work to ask if they can make me a surprise from their recipe book. I agree to this asking, as nicely as possible, that they clean up after themselves.  At about 3.30 Gary phones, asking where I am and Jarred eventually arrives at four o’clock. At four fifteen Katie calls, asking how far I am from home because the surprise is waiting. I drop Jarred at home and Gary takes his place in the car. Katie runs out asking where I’m going and saying that the surprise is ready. I assure her that I will not be long. We get to Vodacom, sign the papers and are told that it will cost R65.00. Gary and I look at each other incredulously. Neither of us has money on us.  He decides to drop me at home, as I’m really anxious to have my surprise before the babies’ dad fetches them for the weekend. Gary will fetch my bank-card and go and pay the account. Miraculously we find the card in the car. At home I have a sosatie stick with strawberries, pineapple, banana and dates (because I have given up chocolate for lent) waiting for me on a plate with ice-cream and custard.  Children have an amazing way of erasing a week of stress in an instant, by a simple gesture of love so pure that it melts your insides and touches you to the very core of your being!

 Reality, however, has a nasty way of intruding on the most special of moments. My friend arrives to take me for dinner but my ex has not yet collected the children. The place is unbelievably noisy. There is a ridiculous modern musical blasting from the television and Jarred is showing everyone his political song. The atmosphere is mildly crazy but very enjoyable. The ex hoots at the gate for the little ones. Unfortunately at this precise moment my father and brother decide to have a very heated altercation. I do not want my children’s father to hear or see anything about the argument (long story) so I rush the children out as soon as possible.  It is a scene from a black comedy. The more I tell them that they must leave quickly, the more times they return to fetch something that they have forgotten. It is unbelievable! Finally they leave and I breathe a sigh of relief. My eldest son’s girlfriend has been ushered into the cottage to escape the argument inside.  My friend and I leave, I tell Jarred where to hide the keys and I, naively, believe that I am due for a quiet and peaceful weekend.

Dinner is uneventful except for when I go to the bathroom, get confused with the doors and end up exiting the ladies and entering a sushi restaurant that I hadn’t been eating at. After the initial confusion, I make a hasty retreat and find my friend outside, waiting for me.  While on my way to the bathroom I discover that Jarred has called me twenty-two times and I have finally heard the phone on the twenty- third try. He tells me that there is trouble at home and on top of this he has dropped my cottage keys into the cottage and cannot get them out. My friend and I end up getting into the cottage by unscrewing one of the security gates, at the same time releasing my Doberman who has been prisoner in the cottage for goodness knows how long. In the meantime I go to find my brother who has passed out in the garden and attempt to help him. The rest is a long, involved and futile story and is best ignored and forgotten.

My peaceful Friday ends and I fall into bed and into a deep sleep.

I have big plans for Saturday. I am going to get myself out of debt. I will get up relatively late, go to the bank and draw the money. I will then pay off my clothing accounts, my T.V. and buy my daughter and my friend their birthday presents. I have, however, discovered that in life that you should never plan anything. Go with the flow. That way you can never be irritated! This I have discovered but unfortunately I have never actually learnt from it.

I arrive at the bank. None of the banks at the mall have electricity. I swear, various expletives, under my breath and head off to the other mall. I think that I am very clever but at the same time have a sense of foreboding about what I will find at that bank. I am astounded beyond my normal ability to be astounded! The queues begin at the tellers inside the bank (far, far inside the bank), out the door and all the way down to Woollworths, which is about half a city block away. All the other banks have the same problem. I mutter some more swear words, this time including some obscenities about the state of the country and decide on retail therapy, which I most certainly cannot afford.  I head home, make a hubbly (yes, again) and tidy my flat. I am busy with this when my brother’s weird girlfriend starts yelling out my name. Jarred is amazed to see me hurl myself across the room, jump out of my shoes and fling myself onto Katie’s bed, at the same time begging him to tell her that I’m asleep. I close my eyes tightly, praying that she won’t come in.  Jarred, the horror, lets me lie like that for a few minutes, choosing not to tell me that she is gone. I continue to hide for awhile then poor myself a glass of wine (yes, again), put on a load of washing, set up the ironing board and complete all my outstanding ironing. I am Superwoman! I am Wonder Woman! I am Mother! I put washing on the line and it rains! I am Exceedingly Irritated Woman.

I, being so damn popular, have three invitations for Saturday evening. My haemorrhoids are agonizing at this stage and I decide I cannot go to the braai. I also don’t feel like visiting the young obsessive phone caller. I decide to surprise my friend and go to him to watch a DVD. The evening is uneventful except for the fact that my eldest son keeps phoning me to yell about how unfair it is that he has to lift my middle son to a party. He rants about how far it is and how it’s unfair to use his girlfriend’s car.  At about ten o’clock I go home and sit with Gary in the cottage until he leaves to fetch his girlfriend. I bath and, exhausted, climb into bed. The cell rings at 12.30. That dreaded call that will inform me that Jarred cannot get a lift home and I must fetch him. I am half asleep and ask Jarred to call me back with directions. Gary calls and tells me where to go. I put my dog in the car – she is astounded (as astounded as a dog can be) and we head off into the unknown, with a set of directions on my lap. I am in some God-forsaken place in the middle of the night but I eventually  find the place after a few more phone calls to Gary. I find the street but not the number. There is no number eighteen. Fortunately I am not alone in my stupidity as the taxi driver who has just arrived is also driving up and down the road in search of number eighteen.  I find it, eventually, around the corner – something that must have slipped the minds of both my sons.  I then spend about ten minutes outside waiting for Jarred to appear, anger causing all my arteries to pulse unusually. I cannot call him because, surprise, surprise, his phone is off! I cannot go in because I am in my pyjamas. I am on the verge of an embolism when he appears at the gate, glass in hand. I am irritated. I am tired. I tell him to throw the drink out.  His friend then proceeds to vomit next to my car. I am petrified. He cannot puke in my car. He sits in the front, window wound down and proceeds to tell me, in a very elevated tone, how much he loves me and what a good person I am. I am almost deaf when we reach home. I flop into bed at 1.30 in the morning.

Sunday – wonderful Sunday. I get up late. I go to breakfast with my friends. Have a wonderful Pina Colada (spelling) and then head home. I must go shopping for my friend’s present, but decide to go with him so he can choose it. Then we see a movie. I am relaxed for the first time in a week!  He drops me at home. I iron the load of washing on the line and put on another load. The older boys are home and have toast, biscuits and dips for supper. This is my day, this is my moment, this is my time! I am tired. I am relaxed and I must preserve the last iota of strength that I have to begin this routine all over again!

The conclusion of this pitiful but ultimately fulfilling tale – : I am tired, I am stressed but hey I do these things for the people that I love. I love and am loved and nothing is too much  – although it sometimes seems that way.

And Monday I want to start gym again! Wish me luck!

More English Kids Songs Articles

• each song is explained in ASL
• sung and signed!
• great program !
• very comprehensive !

The Windows CD presents six songs typically learned by young children-sung and signed! The songs shown are: The Wheels on the Bus, Happy Birthday, The Ants Go Marching, The Green Grass Grows All Around, Old MacDonald Had a Farm, and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. As the songs are sung, Paws the dog signs, and graphics convey the lyrics, as well as information about the notes and volume. In addition, each song is explained in ASL.

Rating: (out of reviews)

List Price: $ 49.99

Price: $ 25.50

There are many easy guitar songs available on the radio daily that beginners can try to play and enjoy. Easy guitar songs for beginners are those songs that have few chord progressions and changes, as this presents the most trouble for those first starting out. Songs that have less than 4 guitar chords are considered easy guitar songs. So listen to the radio and find a song you enjoy playing, and start from there. Here are a few ideas on easy guitar songs.

Country Songs

The Chair-George Strait

Who You’d Be Today-Kenny Chesney

Suds in the Bucket- Sara Evans

Rock Songs

What It Takes-Aerosmith

Ain’t Even Done With the Night-John Mellencamp

Bring Me To Life-Evanescence

Pop

According to You-Orianthi

Don’t Trust Me-3Oh!3

Easy Listening

Call Me Al-Paul Simon

New Kid in Town-Eagles

There are many different songs, not just those listed above that offer a beginner a great place to start. Think about your favorite song, and listen to the chords being played and not the difference in the voice singing. Count out how many different chords are being played, and this will tell you how hard a song will be to play. If you count more than 4 chords, it will be a difficult song for you as a beginner. However, if you have a little time under your belt, songs with 5 chords are a bit easier to accomplish. If you are a guitar beginner and do not have too many problems changing chords regularly, you can try the harder songs. But be warned that if you learn the chord changes incorrectly you will not only make the song unrecognizable, but you will set yourself back trying to relearn the proper way.

If you need help learning how to play easy guitar songs there are many things you can do. You can seek help from a friend who plays the guitar or you can find a guitar instructor in your area who offers private lessons. Another great option is to look up some online guitar lessons geared toward easy guitar songs. Online guitar lessons are often free and they are available all over the internet. Taking online lessons can help you progress from beginner to intermediate where harder songs will not be as difficult to learn. Although many look down on these lessons, they are easy to fit into your schedule and do not have to be done outside the house.

MUSIC TO YOUR LITTLE ONE’S EARS

Singing is good for you and your child

Do you sing songs with your child? Sadly it seems more and more children are missing out on the benefits of singing at home with their parents and carers.

Music is not only enjoyable, extensive research shows that exposing young children to music and singing stimulates their intelligence and emotional development.

Young children love music; and songs not only soothe them or make them laugh, they are also a fun way to learn. Playing songs and encouraging your child to sing along can develop their vocabulary, increase their confidence and give them a great head start when they begin full-time education. Recent research byYouth Music, the UK’s largest children’s music charity, shows that enjoying music together and singing songs can help to develop communication, concentration and social skills in under 5s.

Joining in with songs helps build a child’s self-expression, creativity and confidence. Picking up the basics of rhythm, tempo and pitch will help to develop their musicality too.

Tune in to your toddler with these tips

Introduce your child to a wide variety of songs to build their knowledge of words. Let them listen to all kinds of songs and see what they like best. Don’t just restrict them to nursery rhymes, try folk and pop, but make sure the words are appropriate.
Teach your child short, but fun songs – getting them to learn some simple, repetitive lyrics will develop their listening and concentration skills.  
Use songs to help calm your baby or get your toddler to relax for naptime.
If your chid is sleepy in the morning play a cheery song to make them want to get moving.
Children love routine and making songs part of routines makes activities fun. Songs are a great way to help children prepare for transitions from one activity to another, such as tidying up and putting their things away.
Sing together while doing chores or driving somewhere in the car. It’s a good way to build your child’s self esteem especially if you let them choose their favourite songs.
Remember to praise your child after you have both been singing and this will help boost their confidence.
Why not learn songs together and have a family sing-a-long?

Interested in finding out more?

Youth Music, the UK’s largest children’s music charity, believes that singing has the power to change lives. ( http://www.youthmusic.org.uk)

Find some new modern songs for kids. You can hear sample tracks from Let’s Sing! the brand new CD of original children’s songs at:

http://www.childrensongs.org.uk

The Department for Children, Schools and Families have launched ‘Tune In – Year of Music’ to spread the message that music should be an important factor in children’s lives because it can inspire creativity, encourage motivation and build life skills. (http://www.dcsf.gov.uk/tunein/campaign.shtml)

Find lots of ways to motivate your child with music at the BBC Parents’ Music Room (http://www.bbc.co.uk/music/parents/yourchild/18mnths_3years/action_songs.shtml)

Another Patty Shukla action song! This is like a song version of “Red Light, Green Light”, but with fun activities included (Go, Run, Crawl, Dance, Wave Hands) Buy this song on Amazon, iTunes, and most other online music stores. www.amazon.com Patty’s new CD titled “Play with Me, Sing Along” is currently available on Amazon.com atwww.amazon.com Available to purchase on: iTunes (all stores) iTunes Video Napster Rhapsody MusicNet Groupie Tunes Lala.com ShockHound Amie Street Thank you for listening!
Video Rating: 4 / 5

More Kids Songs Articles

Let’s make everyday images more extraordinary. There are some easy to learn everyday tips that can improve your basic photography quickly.

I am not one for “fixing it in Photoshop” or “in the mix” as they say in the music business. As a professional, I want to get it right the first time in camera. Downloading files and fixing things in post is just too time consuming and sloppy for me. So here are eight tips to get you started off right.

Tip #1 Get Closer-Get Lower-Get Higher

Most people I observe stand too far away from the subject they are photographing. I am sure that is because they do not want to call attention to themselves; they want to snap a fast picture and not be noticed or be in the way. But I say, “Get closer to your subject!”

Taking a moment to get closer and not have so much distracting background improves an image greatly. Don’t be shy, move in and get a great picture not just an okay one. Cropping in post production later is okay to a point, but I am for doing it right the first time in the camera. Over cropping degrades the image quality by only using a small part of the file.

Speaking of getting right in there, I was in Las Vegas and found a crowd of people watching and taking pictures of three living statues. These beautiful girls were clothed and painted in one color and looked like real statues. Just once in a while they would move ever so slightly. Similar to the English guard, they will not even move to accept a tip or compliment. I carefully worked myself into the center of the crowd and took a photograph…well, okay, lots of photographs. After a few minutes I realized that the crowd had opened up for me, and I had all the elbow room I wanted.

Try not shooting everything at your standing level. Mix it up a bit and add interest to your images by getting lower and shoot at kid level. I squat, kneel, and lay on my stomach (all of which is getting harder at 40 something!) I often get on a ladder and shoot down on someone by two feet or more. Lay your subject on the ground and shoot almost straight down on them with your head in the ceiling fan. That is fun, too!

Tip #2 Look behind your subject

Many times we notice after the fact that we have a tree trunk, pole, or some other line intersecting the head of our subject. Take a moment to look past your subject and see what may become a distraction. You may have to move around a bit to find a more pleasing angle.

If timing is critical, grab your shot regardless of the background first. Then with the luxury of time back on your side, reposition yourself to eliminate those unwanted lines. With children and pets, you may not get another chance to get exactly what you want so get the image now.

The excuse of “I’ll just fix that later in Photoshop” is for amateurs and reflects sloppy work. Fixing files also takes time and time is money. Photoshop is a great tool to assist you with challenges in images, but it is not an excuse not to do things right in the first place.

Tip #3 Cropping

Go ahead and cut through the top of a head or hat on someone’s head on purpose. Look at the magazines, even scenes on television; they do it all of the time. It adds drama to an image. It draws you to their eyes. Yes, grandma will exclaim, “You cut her head off!” It is an artistic decision. They can learn to deal with it.

Not all images are improved by cropping. Sometimes a client will ask me “How will you crop that?” I prefer to crop in the camera and get the shot I am visualizing at the moment. So what I show them is what it will look like. As mentioned in tip number one, over cropping after the image is taken degrades the image quality by only using a small part of the original file.

Be aware that even if a client likes a photographic style and comments on how much they like it, they may still not be comfortable with it on their own images. That happens quite a bit. Educating your client or subject will make it more acceptable to them, and maybe in time they will trust you to do something creative.

Go ahead and include some images that have dramatic cropping. It adds to the variety of choices. The client may not select them, and that’s okay. Put one on your wall as a display and enjoy the compliments.

Tip #4 Lens Selection

The focal length of the lens you select and the aperture you shoot at also affects the look of your photograph.

For you techies, I realize that the size of the digital sensor can change the true results of our lenses depending on what camera model we have, but for now lets keep it simple.

A standard 50mm lens that comes with most cameras sees like your eye does. It sees a similar field of view of about 50-55 degrees. It is the most natural look because it is like our eyes, but I find it so boring that I do not own a prime lens like this.

A wider angle lens, less than 50 mm, is going to see a wider view that your own eye can normally see. This is helpful when you want to record scenery. This makes for a great vacation lens. Do be careful when using it for portrait work as you may get distortion. When working at a wide open f-stop you will need to be more careful on how you focus.

A telephoto lens, over 50mm, is going to have a tighter view and magnify the subject. I think portraits look better this way. The larger the number, the more magnification it has.

A macro lens is for getting close-ups of small items like flowers, insects, or other details. Use a tripod for best results and eliminate the blur that easily occurs from being at such close range.

Try an experiment for yourself. Find a simple subject like a flower in the garden. Stand in one place and use some different focal length lenses. See how much the image changes when you go from wide angle, to normal, to telephoto.

The aperture you select will also determine the look of your photograph. A large f stop number like f16 will have a greater depth of field than a small f stop number like f4.

The shutter speed you use also plays a part in the final look of the image. A faster shutter speed will stop motion and a slower shutter speed can might show some blur.

Tip #5 Distortion

One way distortion happens is if you are too close to your subject using a wide angle lens. You will find the facial features warped and distorted. I see many amateur images that have this problem, and they generally do not notice it.

Don’t use 28mm, stand close to a person and try to take a nice portrait. You will have a very distorted face and an unhappy customer. Any lens focal length greater than 50mm would look much better for a portrait. I personally prefer to shoot at 135mm – 200mm and stand a good ten to fifteen feet from my portrait subject. The compression is great and it is very flattering.

If someone sits facing you and has their feet or hands extended out towards you, their feet or hands are going to look too big and out of proportion. Unless you are shooting a shoe catalog, or going for an unusual technique, this perspective may not be an attractive look. Keeping the body parts on a more similar plane of focus will look nicer.

Tip #6 Expression

The most endearing part of any photograph of people is the expression. All other elements may fail, and we still love the photograph because of the expression.

Getting a great expression is often the hardest part of taking portraits. There are so many factors that come into play. This skill takes time to develop and find out what works and what does not.

You could try talking about something funny or sing silly songs. Saying “cheese” is not recommended. You know what you’ll get? A big, fake, toothy, goofy face.

Putting so much pressure on a child to perform can really get in the way of getting real expressions. Let them play a little, relax, and let them warm up to you.

It is often harder photographing your own kids and pets because they know how to push your buttons! That’s a good thing for us professional photographers. Our many years of experience working with so many people of all ages really shows in our work.

Tip #7 Color

Our eye wants to look at the brightest area of an image first. If you want the center attention to be the face, a really bright orange shirt, pretty as it may be, will only detract from that great expression you just captured. Oftentimes a portrait client will want to wear something that makes them feel good. That wild stripe shirt or loud graphic often is not the best choice for a portrait as it demands a lot of attention. A solid color that matches or is close to your subject’s eye color will really be more attractive.

Many people love to wear red. It is an understandable selection for an outgoing, fun loving person, but not the best choice for a professional portrait. Pair that up with the corporate white shirt and power tie. It makes sense. However! The red is so powerful and demands so much attention that it is not my idea of a great professional image. After a consultation with me where I showed them other possibilities and suggestions, they selected softer colors that let you see their faces first. After that you can appreciate the understated details of a well coordinated wardrobe.

Tip #8 Exposure

This is a big in-depth topic as it has so many variables. One change you can make is to be aware that the exposure will be difficult when photographing very light and very dark items at the same time. The large amount of contrast is difficult to record well.

That is why I prefer overcast days, big clouds over the sun in a bright sky, or working in complete shade. If you can place your subject in the shade, so they can have their eyes open and not have a really bright sky or hot spot behind them, that will look much nicer than out in full sun with harsh shadows and squinty eyes.

If you are using automatic settings, try to avoid lighting conditions that have high contrast. Full sunlight coming through sparse trees makes for a lot of bright spots on the ground is not the best place to photograph.

Mid day is kind of a tricky time of the day to photograph. Think about shooting at almost sunset or sunrise when the shadows are long and the light is softer. We call that “sweet light.” Other solutions (that would be easier if it wasn’t a prey animal we were dealing with) would be a more evenly shaded area, adding reflection or extra lighting.

Go out and shoot!

With practice, these eight tips will become easier to do in your everyday photography. Eventually, these steps will become practically automatic, and you won’t have to try to remember them. Then you can move on to other techniques and acquire more skills.

Marathi Movie Aadhar – 2002 with English Subtitle Produced and directed by Mahesh Tilekar, ‘Aadhar’ is an emotional family drama. Cast – Aishwarya Narkar, Sajid Shaikh, Jayaram Kulkarni, Sulabha Arya, Viju Khote, Nayantara, Vijay Chavan, Laxmikant Berde, Guddi Maruti, Kishori Ambiye, Tom Alter, Dinesh Hingoo, Avinash Kharshikar, Achala Sachdev, Mac Mohan. Aadhar is the story of a young girl – Aishwarya Narkar who takes upon herself the responsibility of being the sole breadwinner for her family which includes an unemployed brother, a mentally-impaired brother, a sister who wants to complete her education and a father who has lost his hand in an industrial accident. She fights the odds against her with a rare grit and determination, but will she emerge triumphant in the end? Bollywood stars Akshay Kumar and Jaya Prada make cameos appearances in the film.Visit us at www.rajshrimarathi.com for the latest marathi film trailers, songs & scenes and movies.

Marathi Movie Nashibachi Aishi Taishi – 2006 with English Subtitle directed by Vijay Satghare. Cast – Sanjay Narvekar, Priyanka Yadav, Vijay Chavan, Ravindra Berde, Shanta Tambe, Ramesh Chandane, Usha Naik, Kishor Nandalskar, Asit Redis, Kishor Ravrane, Arun Hornekar, Digambar Naik, Ujwala Shah, Meena Pisal, Dinesh Hingu. Synopsis: Ravi is a simpleton who stays along with his widowed mother in a small house and faces many problems in his life – socially, economically, and emotionally. He is in love with Rani, but it seems that his love story will have to face many hurdles. Once, Ravi has an unexpected accident and he learns that his entire future might completely change because of the accident.Naaradmuni is been sent on earth to make Ravi commit a sin so that they might get a reason to take away his life. After landing on earth, Naaradmuni is exposed to human emotions, which later changes Naaradmunis way of thinking. Why is Naaradmuni behind Ravis life? Will Naaradmuni prove successful in making Ravi commit a sin? Will Ravi be able to marry his beloved Rani even after facing constant hurdles? Do not waste anymore time, watch this amazing movie Nashibachi Aishi Taishi! Visit us at www.rajshrimarathi.com for the latest marathi film trailers, songs & scenes and movies.

PLEASE VOTE FOR ME!! momentrepreneur.savvymom.ca I’veentered the Savvy Mom Entrepreneur contest and if you are viewing this and take a minute to go and vote for me you can help me win! Thank you sooo much for your help! ANNOUNCING our new MSH Baby Sign Language Dictionary iPhone App: mysmarthands.com www.mysmarthands.com http **NOTE: The letter ‘P’ in this video is what your view is. When you make the sign the thumb should be facing towards your body. If you want to learn the alphabet visit our video here: www.youtube.com To download an mp3 file of this song please visit: www.mindbites.com We use this song in our classes to teach older kids the sounds the letters make. If you teach it in conjunction with the ASL hand shapes then the child learns to recognize the hand shape and the sound that goes with it. You can then start putting the letters together to form words. **view my profile to see the Canadian version of this song For more info and videos visit: www.mysmarthands.com Join our baby sign language FACEBOOK group where you can post questions and get great resources www.facebook.com For parents; learn how to sign with your baby videos: www.mysmarthands.com And finally for an amazing information site on baby sign language visit: www.learnbabysigning.com
Video Rating: 4 / 5

www.wearebusybeavers.com CHECK IT OUT!! Some of the first phrases people learn in English are how to describe how they are feeling. This can be practiced and repeated in every lesson. “I”m Happy” includes must-know vocabulary for any young learner. It’s a great starting point. You can watch this whole video by becoming a paying subscriber at www.wearebusybeavers.com
Video Rating: 4 / 5

Elohim Natan Lecha Bematana for download song: www.sendspace.com Lyrics Hebrew (in Latin Alefbet) Elohim natan lecha bematana Davar gadol davar nifla Elohim natan lecha bematana Et hachayim al pney ha’adama Natan lecha et halayla ve’hayom Ahava, tikva vechalom Kayitz, choref, stav, aviv Neshama tova lehabit saviv Natan lecha sadot yerukim Prachim ve’etzim melavlevim Neharot, nechalim veyamim Shamayim, yare’ach, kochavim Elohim natan lecha bematana Davar gadol davar nifla Elohim natan lecha bematana Et hachayim al pney ha’adama Natan leach chagim veshabatot Israel eretz ha’avot Yadaim verosh lehagshim chalomot Natan lecha et kol hanifla’ot Natan lecha dvarim kol kach tovim Lehavi la’olam yeladim Leha’azim leshirim, lir’ot tzva’im Ho, ma rabu ma’asecha Elohim Elohim natan lecha bematana Davar gadol davar nifla Elohim natan lecha bematana Et hachayim al pney ha’adama Elohim ten li rak od matana Matana ktana ach nifla’ah Elohim ten li rak od matana Et hashalom al pney ha’adama English Translation Gd gave you a present A huge, wonderful thing Gd gave you a present Living on this earth He gave you day and night Love, hope and a dream Summer, winter, autumn, spring And a good soul to look around He gave you green fields Flowers and blooming trees Rivers, brooks and seas Heaven, moon and stars Gd gave you a present A huge, wonderful thing Gd gave you a present Living on this earth He gave you high holidays and the Sabbath He gave you Israel , our fathers’ land Hands and a head to …
Video Rating: 4 / 5

Marathi Comedy Movie – Ishhya Director: Prashant Girkar, Staring: Ankush Chowdhary, Shweta Shinde, Bharat Jadhav, Kishor Nandaloskar, Savita Malpekar, Uday Tikekar, Ujwala Jog, Vijay Chavhan, Trupti Bhoir, Kshitij Zharapkar, Priti Joshi, Kranti Redkar Music: Sharang Dev. Synopsis – Vaibhav and Rasika are a happily married couple. They are professionally well settled and are pleased to accept each other’s diametrically opposite nature. Vaibhav is very fond of children whereas Rasika is more concerned about her looks due to which she does not wish to get pregnant. Hence, there is a big vacuum in their lifethe joy of being a parent! Vaibhav could not tolerate this and their relationship starts suffering. One fine morning, Vaibhav wakes up and finds himself in a weird situation. He could not understand the meaning of all the changes occurring in him over a period of time. Vaibhav’s friend notices that these changes are the symptoms of pregnancy. Now, that is too shocking, isn’t it? Can you ever imagine a man becoming pregnant? Catch this hilarious story that questions the system of nature? Visit us at www.rajshrimarathi.com for the latest marathi film trailers, songs & scenes and movies.
Video Rating: 5 / 5

Marathi Comedy Movie – Ishhya Director: Prashant Girkar, Staring: Ankush Chowdhary, Shweta Shinde, Bharat Jadhav, Kishor Nandaloskar, Savita Malpekar, Uday Tikekar, Ujwala Jog, Vijay Chavhan, Trupti Bhoir, Kshitij Zharapkar, Priti Joshi, Kranti Redkar Music: Sharang Dev. Synopsis – Vaibhav and Rasika are a happily married couple. They are professionally well settled and are pleased to accept each other’s diametrically opposite nature. Vaibhav is very fond of children whereas Rasika is more concerned about her looks due to which she does not wish to get pregnant. Hence, there is a big vacuum in their lifethe joy of being a parent! Vaibhav could not tolerate this and their relationship starts suffering. One fine morning, Vaibhav wakes up and finds himself in a weird situation. He could not understand the meaning of all the changes occurring in him over a period of time. Vaibhav’s friend notices that these changes are the symptoms of pregnancy. Now, that is too shocking, isn’t it? Can you ever imagine a man becoming pregnant? Catch this hilarious story that questions the system of nature? Visit us at www.rajshrimarathi.com for the latest marathi film trailers, songs & scenes and movies.

Alex Panayi and Matheson Bayley cover the 1994 ESC winner “Rock n roll kids”. I do not own the rights neither to this song nor to the photos featured in this clip. LYRICS I remember Sjúbídú A-Ba-Ni-Bi, Boom Βang-Α Bloody Βang & Diggey-Friggin’-Loo “Yama Yama”‘s, “Bana Bana”‘s, “La, La, La”‘s, “Ding Dang Dong”‘s — Sophisticated songs! Noel Kelehan and Ossi Runne — where are you? Terry Wogan — what a rogue! — ‘n’ Johnny Logan too No-one’s better than such a veteran Nowadays are sour days — Yes, the Eurovision’s gone down the pan We were the ESC kids Jury votes were all we did And Germany would never ever ever give Turkey the douze Then televoting came along Now quality’s irrelevant — Pick any song Just give ‘em belly dancers, somersaults and trannies if you don’t wanna lose I used to have a go at Croat, and Danish vowels Oh how I hungered for Hungarian and Hebrew growls Though we had no choice We had a patriotic voice Now Finns have finished singing in the Finnish tongue No longer will we hear the phlegm of Flemish sung We were, when we were young A polyglottal lot Whichever fool made up the Free Language rule Should be publicly shot Before we had the likes Of announcing votes by satellite and radio mikes Luxembourg and Italy were the names of the game But then the contest took a knock We were invaded by the Eastern Block And in case this sounded racist — relegation’s to blame Now ABBA’s been ‘n’ gone; Céline Dion’s still here But these days even entering can end a …
Video Rating: 5 / 5

أغنية رائعة بمعانيها الإنسانية العالية مترجمة، هي صرخة نداء لقادة العالم لوقف الحروب والظلم في العالم، ولحماية الأطفال من ويلات الحروب، وللإنقاذ الطبيعة من غطرسة الإنسان. الأغنية بأداء الطفل ديكلان غالبرث من بريطانيا Tell Me Why – Declan Galbraith with Arabic and English lyrics
Video Rating: 4 / 5

In 2003 I decided to take a gap year between school and university to do a mixture of paid work, volunteering and independent travel. Fuelled by clichéd intentions of self discovery and broadening my horizons I set off on an adventure which I can now say with absolute certainty has changed me in ways I never thought possible. If you’re in two minds about the value of taking a gap year, worried about the financial ramifications or just daunted by the prospect of organising and embarking on a new adventure then read on, and let me open your eyes to the possibilities it holds!

My volunteer placement was working in a small Tented Camp on an Island of Lake Baringo, right in the heart of Kenya’s stunning Great Rift Valley. The placement was organised by a gap year company, the only viable way of doing this kind of volunteering since so much of it is about whom you know…and I didn’t seem to know anybody in the safari business! For three months I lived on Safari, waking up to the sound of hippos yawning and the sight of sunrise over Africa. I felt massively privileged to live and work in a part of the world that very few people are lucky enough to see apart from on television documentaries, dubbed by Attenborough’s dulcet tones.

Not a single day of my three months there was routine or boring, I discovered that in Africa no two days are the same and learnt to expect the unexpected! Whether it was taking the speed-boat for an impromptu spin to look for a reported hippo carcass, meeting with tribal chiefs or sitting down to dinner with the Italian Ambassador, every day was different. I felt more alive than I ever had before with my eyes wide open to the possibilities that each moment held. It taught me to be adaptable, to deal with what life throws at you and make the most of every minute…even if it means helping the locals to skin a crocodile!

I was involved in the running of the whole camp, organising reservations, managing the camp’s marketing and P.R., being a hostess and water ski instructor, even teaching new recipes and IT to the African staff! The level of responsibility I was trusted with was beyond anything I’d been given before and gave me the chance to learn and develop so many new skills it’s hard to know where to start. I can now speak a new language (badly!), run a hotel, make sales and know how to write environmental impact reports for the U.N. My bow, as they say, is now thick with strings!

Anyone can claim on their CV to have ‘interpersonal skills’, but how many people can say they’ve managed to keep sixty paying guests happy, managed an African staff of forty and still found the time to entertain kids around the pool! I’ve come away feeling as though I can achieve anything I set my mind to. I know the true value of my opinions and creativity and have so much more confidence in my abilities having proven them to the world. Never again will I be in an interview, stuck for examples of my skills!

I was once told that it’s possible to tell in the first five minutes of meeting a fresher at University whether or not they’ve been on a gap year. It sounds ridiculous but it’s true, those first conversations I had when meeting new people at University were so telling, those who’d had a year off to travel and work had more confidence in themselves, more to say and definitely knew how to have a good time! Whereas school leavers stuck in giggling packs, moving round campus like herds of startled zebra, gapers spoke to any and everyone. If you’ve spent the last twelve months meeting new people, living and working in strange new environments you’re hardly a wall-flower when faced with a room full of strangers.

I was worried that taking a gap year would leave me feeling unenthused by the thought of study, plagued by unbearably itchy feet, but actually the reverse was true. I started my degree knowing exactly why I needed my education and aware of how lucky I was to be receiving one. I knew what I wanted from university and wasn’t afraid to ask for it, changing from English Literature to joint honours with African Studies when I realised I wasn’t enjoying the course. I’m in no doubt I’d have stuck with the easy option if I hadn’t had a gap year, it definitely gave me new interests and attitudes to education. My English friends were so jealous when they heard I was writing essays on the lyrics of Kenyan rap songs rather than Chaucer!

Though it sounds cynical, a gap year undoubtedly secured my place on a competitive course, giving me the edge over other candidates. In an age when so many young people are coming out of A levels with top grades, and everyone’s done a Duke of Edinburgh award and captained a sports team, it’s very hard to make yourself stand out from the crowd. A gap year like mine, where you have a unique experience, give something back to poor communities and prove that you’re able to organise and apply yourself does just that.

More importantly though, taking a gap year has changed the way I look at and engage with the world. Countries and cultures which always seemed abstract and distant from my life suddenly became real to me in a way that I could never have felt from watching them on television or reading about them in newspapers. Poverty really affected me for the first time. I have more interest in current affairs now, and what I feel is a vested interest in Kenya- it’s become my second home. My gap year experience led me to set up a small charity to help the family of one of my African friends and I hope that my gap year will continue to have an impact of the lives of the people I met in Africa.

Being able to experience the developing world on its own terms, giving my time and energy not only to exploration, but to volunteer projects which really benefit the people whose culture and environment was enjoying has given me an experience infinitely richer than anything I’ve done before. The things I saw and did in those fourteen months have influenced every decision and friendship I’ve made since and have steered me onto a path I’d otherwise never have thought to take. If your aspirations stop at tourism volunteering isn’t for you, but if you want to change the way you see the world and yourself, take a gap year!

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We came to Sri Lanka just after finishing our final school exams in Ireland. We wanted to do something different (as opposed to just sunning ourselves in Spain) and that is exactly what we found.

Our first day in Kanishta Vidyalaya School in Mawala is unforgettable! Having just had 14 years as students at home, being referred to as “Teacher miss” took some time to get used to. We started our days at 8 in morning and finished at 1.30pm with a 20 minute break in the middle. We taught from Grades 1 up to Grade 11 (which was strange as most of the students were the same age as us!).

The older students liked to speak and write a lot with the occasional highly competitive game of Hangman. The younger students used us as human climbing frames as they sang (or screamed) songs to us. Needless to say, everyday left us exhausted. Within our first week we were bombarded with little notes from the girls saying “my friends are Ali and Katie”. Three students even knelt down to our feet to say thank you after a lesson!!!

When they began their exams in Mawala we moved to Welapitiya Montessori in Panadura to decorate the walls. The three teachers there were so friendly and it became their mission to feed us as much as possible. One day we actually ate a whole loaf of bread and a bunch of bananas each…I kid you not! We decorated the outside walls (no pressure on us at all!) and Katie grew rather attached to her penguin “Pengui”!

For our final week we taught English in the Panadura Buddhist temple. There were six boys between the age of 12 and 14. Of course there was the exception of the head monks always joining our class, who giggled in the corner and was disappointed if he didn’t get the gold star too! Their English was amazing and they were so eager to learn. We couldn’t believe it as we tried to play a game and they preferred to write and read. They were the sweetest and friendliest people we have ever met and leaving them is difficult.

We came here thinking a month would seem very long but now we would love another two months

Watch fun filled animation stories for Kids. We present you the story of Chatrapathi Shivaji Maharaj Date Of Birth : 19th February 1627, Birth Place : Shivneri Fort – Junnar, Father : Shahaji, Mother : Jijabai, Original Name: Shiva. Brought up on the stories of the Mythological heroes, the great Maharatta not only cocked a snook at the mighty Moghul Empire but also build a dominion of his own. Shivaji was an unbelievable amalgam of personal bravery and the sense of strategy. He knew when to strike and when to give in.Click www.rajshrimarathi.com to watch more songs & stories for Childrens..

Watch fun filled animation stories for Kids. We present you the story of Chatrapathi Shivaji Maharaj Date Of Birth : 19th February 1627, Birth Place : Shivneri Fort – Junnar, Father : Shahaji, Mother : Jijabai, Original Name: Shiva. Brought up on the stories of the Mythological heroes, the great Maharatta not only cocked a snook at the mighty Moghul Empire but also build a dominion of his own. Shivaji was an unbelievable amalgam of personal bravery and the sense of strategy. He knew when to strike and when to give in.Click www.rajshrimarathi.com to watch more songs & stories for Childrens..

Newcastle has a fabulous mix of the past and the present – not so much with the balance, but how all these things are laid out together to present a amazing picture. From the historic spots of Newcastle, to the rightful label as the ultimate sports city scene in the UK, you does discover this city has more peculiar yet superb destinations. Newcastle has been instrumental to the country’s industrial development marking it a primary city in the region. Newcastle upon the River Tyne paints a surreal picture that can only be grasped by actually being there.

The Tyne Bridge is definitely the most popular place of interest in all Newcastle. It connects Newcastle upon Tyne and Gateshead and was designed by Mott, Hay, and Anderson who are also credited for designing the equally popular and beautiful Forth Road Bridge. After designing, Dorman Long and Co. were commissioned to build the bridge.

The bridge was also given cinematographic importance in the movie “Goal” due to the magnificence of the structure.

One can also visit St. James Park, where Newcastle United Football Clubs plays its home matches. It is usually filled with a capacity crowd of 52,387 when the club plays. This is helped by the fact that Newcastle United is the only football club in all Newcastle

Take advantage of the many things to do in Newcastle. Shopping is a big draw here; take a walk through the many works of art displayed for sale at University Gallery, and see many interesting photos from local and regional artists at the Side gallery. Or visit the many parks located throughout Newcastle, such as Gibside, Exhibition Park, and Leazes Park. All the parks are beautifully maintained and easy to get to, and popular for tourists and locals alike. Newcastle offers a wide variety of museums for kids and adults, which in turn offers entertainment and learning value all at once.

There are definitely a lot of classy and delicious restaurants, food stalls, and public houses in the city. A popular pub is Black Bull Public House, which is known for being one of the best football pubs in the city. It is always full on Newcastle United match days. It also offers some quality beer that pub-goers have testified to as ‘the best.’

A delicious restaurant, on the other hand, is Comfort Food Co Ltd., which focuses on good cooking and an even better atmosphere to fill its seats up. The food and wine offered in the restaurant is top notch, and the customers are always happy to advertise that Comfort Food is exquisite and unique as a restaurant. It is commonly almost full by 9 pm, so it is wise to visit the restaurant early to enjoy space while enjoying the food and soaking one’s self in the atmosphere, as well.

St. James Park provides some of the best sporting entertainment in the world. Newcastle United are a great football club, with the likes of Michael Owen and Obafemi Martins playing and the great Kevin Keegan managing the club. It is not just Newcastle that plays in St. James Park. Throughout the season, the stadium is visited by the best teams in England and even Europe such as Liverpool FC, Manchester United FC, Chelsea FC, and Arsenal FC.

The football in Newcastle is definitely something that tourists have to see. Fans are also involved, as they sing songs for their heroes. The match day experience is definitely something else, especially in the football crazy town of Newcastle. Around the city there is not one citizen that does not know the status of their beloved football club.

Newcastle is surely a nice place to visit, as it is a football Mecca as well as a nice place to observe traditional English culture. There are places that offer beer, football, wine, and tea – all the things that make up a solid, traditional English town. The Tyne Bridge is also an attractive place even for non-football fans.

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PART 2. Your Kids Will Learn English Alphabet Individually within Two Week.

Teach your child the Spanish ABC’s the same way you learned the english ABC’s, with an original song by Giftofhappiness Media Productions. Enjoy this excerpt which features Tabby, Robby The Blue Koala, and the whole gang. Be sure to logon to www.giftofhappiness.com to download the entire Spanish Alphabet Song for only 99 cents.
Video Rating: 4 / 5

I left Colombia (continental, that is) with all its guerrilla – army – paramilitary violence plus the mafia-related problems, headed to, as the island´s webpage proclaimed, “the best kept secret in the Caribbean”. (I already knew the secret since I had been on the islands on sabbatical week twice before). The small airport in Providencia, called El Embrujo (The Bewitchment), brought strange deja-vu feelings not counting the fact that I was still mesmerized by the finite but subtle gradation of colors I had seen in the water from the small plane minutes before landing. The airport zone was like a tropical parade with the multi-color passenger lobby looming over gardens of red hibiscus in their turn being pierced by the yellow bananaquit birds fluttering from one flower to the other in a dreamy slow motion. Beyond, the turquoise waters of the Mc. Bean Lagoon National Park shimmered peacefully.

Isla de Providencia & Santa Catalina are two small mountainous outcrops of land less than 8 square miles both situated 400 miles southwest of Jamaica and a quarter of the way on an imaginary line traced across the Caribbean from Punta Gorda, Nicaragua to Cartagena, Colombia. And a few hours after arriving, there I was, sitting behind this large, black, simpatico and unmet women who decided to take me on her small motorcycle to meet my friend Rolando in order to hand him some pictures I had taken the last time I was here. That type of kindness struck me since it is not very usual in many other places. Clearly on the maps says Col. (Colombia) after the name of the islands. How far is reality from the assumptions this abbreviation brings to people’s minds.

The hurricane season has hit few but strong blows on the islands. One of them came about in 1510 when the expedition of Diego de Nicuenza separated from Alonso de Ojeda (Colon´s Second Voyage) and was caught in a storm and its ships blown to a small island which Nicuenza named Santa Catalina, because it was common in those days to name sites after the Saint of the Day. To the other larger island just 200 meters across a shallow sea he gave the name Providencia in honor to the God that had just saved him.  The beautiful Lover’s Floating Bridge now links the two islands.

A name and a position on a map brought settlers. As the Spanish colonies in Central and South America grew more and more, slaves tried to escape from imprisonment and reached the islands.

So it was for 150 years when the buccaneers, having been given the Elizabethan wink to raze the Spanish galleons that traversed the region hefty with the New World richness, looked for a good place to establish their operations and cure their illnesses. They found these mountainous islands, ungoverned, hills ready to be used as searching periscopes over the Caribbean. Who else could find safety there but the famous Welsh pirate Morgan with also famous Paco, the parrot that sat on his shoulder? Legend says he buried the treasures stolen in Panama in 1671 in these islands.

After Morgan’s escape to Jamaica the Spanish took control of the islands but only by word of mouth since English men with their slaves from Jamaica and the Cayman Islands tried to establish cotton farming here but instead ended up raising cattle. By this time the population was as diverse as the vessels that traversed the Caribbean. Nevertheless, lovers were not interested in racial aspects and African, Anglo, Dutch (who were also around) and Latin mixed, populating the island with that distinct clear eyes-dark skin look of many persons in Providencia. After much give-and-take among governments and several entangled political moves that passed through England, Spain, colonial Guatemala, Chile (the son of Admiral Louis Aury, a corsair, claimed the islands for Chile), Nueva Granada (which included actual Colombia and Panama) and Nicaragua, Colombia would stay with the islands although, as so many islands nowadays, looking at a map it would never occur to anyone that they belong to this country.

Providencians feel Colombian but most of all they feel Providencian, a pride openly demonstrated when they start so many phrases with the words “Our island” talking to outsiders or when they speak a distorted English among them with distinct accents and Spanish words intermixed but very different to the ‘Spanglish’ spoken by Hispanic immigrants in the U.S. They even distill their own Providencia Old Bushi Rum (a little too strong for me I have to say) using spring water outbursting from the mountains. As kind and joyful as they are to other people, they don’t want their island becoming another San Andres, a larger island of the same archipelago with duty-free commerce all around and overpopulation problems. Residence in the island is controlled by a government agency called OCCRE and for outsiders is very difficult to get permanent resident status as more and more tourists that visit Providencia want to stay and share the secret. As I casually heard a woman saying to another: “that seems to happen to everybody that comes to the island. They come for eight days, fall in love with it and then don’t want to leave”.

I remember one night in Providencia as one of the most pleasing I ever had in my life. I was staying at one of the two cabins that a middle-aged fisherman named Van Britton had on Black Bay. That night the waves crashed against the lower wall of the cabin and through a glassless window I could see myriad stars while I slowly fell asleep. At morning a temperate breeze swayed my mosquito net in harmony with the ebb tide. That morning I felt I had found what peace and harmony are about.

There are no big hotels in Providencia, instead there has been an initiative toward having the natives install small cabins in synchrony with the colorful wooden architecture of the islands. The ‘native dwellings’ program surely established the islands as the place for a tourism more willing for nature’s calm rhythms but not entirely disregarding human conveniences or night life for that matter: it is a pleasure to go dancing reggae on one of the open-air bars just by the sea as I did one night with some friends. We arrived a little early by Providencian standards, so we just waited there talking, drinking beer and enjoying the warm night air. By midnight the dance floor was filled with people moving softly to Lucky Dube’s songs.  A longhaired Rasta told me: “this is great, everybody is groovying now” giving me a big smile. I couldn’t have said it better.

The next day I snorkeled from Black Bay to South West Beach passing in front of small beaches with cerulean bays in whose depths hid octopuses, eels, sea snakes and all kinds of coral fish luminous under the sun. I lingered in the water while some horses, one of the foreign contributions to the islands, were readied for a race on the distant beach. It was another Saturday for the Providencia derby and kids around twelve years old jockeyed horses along the shore, riding without saddles and hoping for a moment of glory, the horses’ owners expecting big dividends.  If it’s not horses it’s sail boats or dominoes. “People just love to bet even if they have no money” a young woman named Luz Marina Livingston told me.  But more than that they love the sea. These people are fishermen, sailors and even the most office-secluded person has to take a glimpse at the Caribbean waters daily. They depend on the sea for food in many ways: the staples are fish, sea snail, lobster, and the black land crabs that have to reproduce in the sea but most of the supplies also come by sea on twice-a-week (when lucky) ships from the continent: gasoline, potatoes, rice, flour, drinking water, etc.  If a ship breaks as it happened when I was there, everybody tries to move around the least possible. There are two occasions when everybody stays at their home in Providencia, everyone coincided: when the ship with the gasoline for the hundreds of motorcycles doesn’t come and when it rains.  So from late April to July during the rain season the other ubiquitous inhabitants of the islands come out and take control.

The phenomenon of thousands of crabs that live in the mountains, following their ancestral instincts, coming down the hills to the coast where they reproduce is a truly remarkable natural event. I had specially come at this time of year to witness the march. Confusion, however, was what I found. If somebody told me the crabs had already come down this year just a week before my arrival, a few hours later another person, with the same ‘I know for sure’ look on his face said that they were still to come. 12 days went by and I had to resign myself to watch the crabs eating decaying matter at night. There are many sites where this same reproduction spree takes place. In Christmas Island on the Indian Ocean 120 million crabs (a different species) do the same process and though such numbers are not reported in Providencia, the pictures I had seen showed black crabs covering the only paved road in the island which could be closed at this time of year at Crab Peak Hour Traffic.

After a heavy nocturnal storm I rose early one clear morning day and headed for shore where I found tiny little spiders moving in the pockets of rain. What I took for spiders were actually newly transformed land crabs heading to the mountains. There weren’t a lot of them but it was wonderful to see a life cycle completion, how endurance had worked for these little crabs after being dropped as eggs in the ocean without any other maternal care.

I had yet to see the beginning of the cycle, and it occurred one night when I heard scratching noises on my room door. I knew burglary wasn’t one of Providencia’s problems so I figured it could only be that the crabs had started their 200 meters migration to the shore. The females’ underbodies were full with eggs that looked like Iranian caviar ready to be spread on a cracker. As I moved through the wave of crabs they clapped their claws fiercely. I saw some entering the hotel’s kitchen, climbing walls, crossing the road painfully slowly, descending staircases and some even plummeted from high cliffs to fall unharmed on the rocky shore. The ones that made it to shore settled a little bit and then came forward to reach the gentle surf. At the first contact with the water the females raised their claws like in ecstasy and danced a trembling tropical ‘cumbia’ letting go of their eggs.

The day before departure I grabbed my hammock and decided to tackle The Peak, the tallest mountain of the island. I had never been on that part of the island and, as I would learn later, should have. I passed the last settlements where a few undernourished cows grazed over the dry grass. Then I followed the spring the owner of the hotel told me to look for. The spring was a trickle at this time of year and the tall trees cast a green tinge down over the rocks that formed every now and then small cascades where I sat massaging my back with the falling water. Apparently the mango trees had adapted very well to the environment and some were so plush with fruit that the rocks below were stamped with their explosions. A small shack appeared near the end of the forest assuring me I was in the right direction since this should be the cabin of a hermit Rasta man that makes a living with what he can reap from nature. A little farther up, the forest was one of short palm trees and scrubby vegetation; the ground was rocky which reminded me that this archipelago had risen through volcanic activity millions of years ago. On the top the metallic plaque that stated the 370 meters (1220-ft.) of altitude of The Peak welcomed me mirroring the setting sun.

 Since its eruption from the depths through all the years of political moves of possessive governments the island and Providencians have managed to keep the same peace and tranquility of always and that is their best kept secret.

Day in the Life: Providencia

Providencia

I thought I would share this with you. My kids usually ask me to translate songs for them because they don’t know spanish. It sounds ok in spanish, but rather funny in english! I hope you enjoy! I only translated the first part because the rest is in english already.

Terry Scott was an English actor and comedian who appeared in several ‘Carry On’ films. He also appeared in a long-running BBC tv sitcom called ‘Terry and June’. Terry’s novelty record ‘My Brother’ was written by Mitch Murray and was based on a schoolboy character (he dressed in school uniform to sing it on TV), and the song was very popular on BBC Radio children’s request shows for many years. In the 1970s, Terry revived the role in a series of TV commercials for a chocolate snack called Curly Wurly, in which he again dressed up as a schoolboy, complete with short trousers and cap. This copy of My Brother is from a vinyl single which was released in 1962 on the Parlophone label but failed to make a mark in the pop charts – despite its popularity on the radio. Sadly, Terry died of cancer in 1994 at the age of 67, but his film roles, and this song, still survive to keep us smiling.
Video Rating: 5 / 5

Some points to bear in mind when watching this: 1. These lyrics were written by ear by a Korean fan.. the words are not “Be” backwards letter for letter. 2. Most Korean Epik High fans think the lyrics written to this are too “forced” over rough meaningless sounds, and so do I, for the most part. 3. The only part that’s even certain is “Mean to say” backwards is 예수님- Lord Jesus.. the rest is just what people think they hear.. some people think the part after that says 어디있나요?, or 어디있어요?, or 이리 오세요 (where are you?, where are you?, come here) The truth is I don’t think all Koreans even hear the same thing on that one part. The fan who wrote this thought it said 예수님 날 맞으시고있나요?.. a strange expression (this version is full of strange expressions) 4. Backmasking has been done on practically any kind of song (like kids show themes and christian songs) and scary messages have come out.. I really don’t believe the majority of backmasking is intentional hidden messages Because of its inaccuracy, disputabilty and the controversy, I don’t even want to include this on my normal account. Though I don’t think the whole song backwards is a whole other intentional message, I think there could be a few messages in the backmasking that are possibly intentional.. Translation and Subs- The Asian Mission

The Novices Manual To Enjoying The Guitar – New to guitar? Then the following is an excellent location to start off mastering tips on how to participate in guitar. From uncomplicated guitar chords, to effortless guitar music. Tuning the guitar Simple Guitar Tuning – Within this starter guitar lesson you’ll discover one of the most fundamental guitar tuning procedure, tune which has a piano, electronic guitar tuners, tuning forks, and so forth..
.

Statistically it may be shown that much more men and women are perfect handed than still left handed. So for the perfect handed individual the still left hands are going to be the weaker palm. In conditions of becoming weak, I mean it does not shift as rapidly as well as the fingers aren’t as nimble. The muscles within the still left hands is going to be far more sluggish due to the fact we won’t be applying it as very much as the suitable. Because of this weaker still left palm, novice piano players struggle with participating in the piano with equally arms in the very same time.

Yamaha keyboards craftsmanship is properly regarded amongst some in the worlds most accomplished musicians.
jazz piano modules online

Legendary jazz pianist Oscar Peterson has performed countless times on Yamaha electronic keyboards. He is also a great instance of what I would call an “improv” energy player form. Meaning that piano players might be categorized according to their participating in type.

Though there are numerous, for your adult novice I would decide on the sequence by Bastien titled “The Adult Beginner” It truly is exceptional for adults, and contains pretty a bit of tunes concept in addition to the piano courses. Basic catalogs about songs:

How to find out piano is the initial question that strikes an enthusiast. Indeed, it can be an wonderful affair. Initially, it can be advised to know in the proper instructor and resources. Novices would require aid with which finger for being employed for which important to participate in the correct insights. As soon as the finger – important system is mastered, it’s then uncomplicated to participate in and interact while using audience, with no owning to appear on the computer keyboard.

Recitals are notorious for embarrassing youngsters, but they might be amazing if the instructor has them usually and makes a enjoyable function out of them. If your instructor does not keep recitals, attempt and locate one more musical overall performance outlet for ones kid. Church, university, clubs, all excellent locations for them to really feel excellent about sharing their gift.

The Piano Lesson: Themes, Motifs, and Symbols Analysis from Sparknotes. About Net English Instructor Web site Map Privacy Policy Contact Us 2010 World-wide-web English Instructor, all rights reserved.

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Teaching Hebrew in a Non-Customary Way

Eliezer Ben Yehuda, father of modern Hebrew, would undoubtedly recognize the language he worked so assiduously to revive. He would also, undoubtedly, be dizzied by the breadth of it — today numbering around 80,000 words.

Dizzying is probably the word that best characterizes how most new immigrants feel about learning the Hebrew language. Which is one explanation why so many of them struggle with the language and are reluctant to either speak it, or do so poorly regardless of how many years they have been here.

Josie Arbel, Director of Klitah Services at AACI (Association of Americans and Canadians in Israel), explains “there are lots of learning styles and many Olim find that the traditional Ulpan formula is a great beginning, but not sufficient to really build conversational skills.”

Elayne, who made Aliyah in 1983 from the United States, admits that while she could read Hebrew and did understand, to some extent, the radio news broadcasts (“I do listen to the news in Hebrew and grasp most of it”), her Hebrew was, at best, “mediocre.” Busy raising her young children, she didn’t have the time to sit down and apply herself to learn to speak Hebrew.

Traditional Ulpans Are Failing

Elayne’s personal experience is backed up with some discouraging statistics. According to studies presented recently to the Knesset’s Immigration and Absorption Committee, sixty percent of immigrants over the age of 30 who graduate from Hebrew Ulpan instructional courses are unable to read, write and speak Hebrew fluently.

Reuven, a businessman and venture capitalist, who made Aliyah five years ago, is convinced the numbers are even higher. “There are so many good minds that just don’t show up at the Ulpan doors and are not included in these statistics.”

Since the opening of the first ulpan in Jerusalem in 1949, more than 1,300,000 new immigrants have graduated from Israel’s Ulpanim.

Today, the basic concept of the Ulpan continues: a certified Hebrew teacher teaches a classroom of students. (Minimum number of students required to open an Ulpan is generally 15 and up to 30). Usually the program runs 5 hours a day, 5 days a week, for 5 months. The students have two things in common: a comparable level of Hebrew language skills, and their new immigrant status. Anything and everything else can vary: age, background, objectives for learning Hebrew, professions, and the list goes on.

Where is the problem?

It’s easy to attribute the lack of proper acquisition of language skills to the fact that the classrooms are too large, the backgrounds of the students too varied, and the goals too different. But, that’s not the only reason that most student graduates in the traditional Ulpans cannot speak Hebrew.

Is Hebrew such a difficult language that it cannot be taught? Or are the students so much different? Rachel Ben-Nun, 40-year veteran Hebrew language teacher in Israel, the United States and Canada explains that Western immigrants close the gap of understanding much more quickly than other immigrants and therefore their incentive to learn the language is lessened. “Much of Hebrew nowadays takes its lexicon from English, and the Western Aliyah is an intelligent Aliyah, so what they can’t close from understanding the exact wording of the language they can figure out based on their knowledge and life experience.”

Akiva Werber, former Jewish Agency Shaliach in the United States and Head of the Jerusalem Communal Aliyah Absorption Program also attributes the failure of many new immigrants to learn Hebrew to the fact that “many go to ulpan because they want to meet other new immigrants. The ulpan is used for social purposes rather than learning purposes.”

Yet, learning to speak, read and write Hebrew is crucial for new immigrants. According to the findings in the Knesset report, “immigrants’ language problems may have consequences such as unemployment and isolation, which can preclude their successful integration.”

Making Ulpan a Serious and Effective Learning Experience

What this has led to is the closing of many public Ulpans (there is talk from the Ministry of Absorption to stop funding public Ulpans altogether) and the proliferation of private Ulpans.

Ulpan Aviv, one of the newest private Ulpans, has had outstanding success with teaching the language to new immigrants, tourists and individuals who are part of extended programs in Israel.

Gil Pentzak, co-manager with Osnat Rance, explains the thinking behind the establishment of Ulpan Aviv. “Osnat and I were Hebrew teachers with a specialty in bi-lingualism. We saw how superior, one-on-one attention was with students. Ulpan Aviv is based on this concept, and enhanced with customized programs so that students are learning the skills they need to speak, read and write Hebrew in their designated fields. We also make use of MP3 recordings, and Skype for distance learning. And, most important is the fact that our students are actively involved; they are speaking Hebrew with us all the time.”

For Reuven, whose Hebrew skills were “okay, but not great” he did his own research before deciding on Ulpan Aviv. When he made Aliyah in 2004, he did what many other new immigrants did; he registered for an Ulpan. “That didn’t work,” he relates, “largely because I just couldn’t sit still in that class. I was bored. So after a month, I left.” Then, he tried Hebrew online. “You get five people online at the same time, and not everyone is at the same level.” But, he was determined, so he went to investigate the Hebrew-language courses at Tel Aviv University, which he subsequently nixed, for the same reason. “Too many people in one classroom. I knew I wouldn’t get a chance to practice what I was learning.”

Ulpan Aviv offered him everything he wanted, and it kept him interested and engaged.

Hebrew Therapy

Gil is the first to admit that there is also a bit of therapy involved in enabling people to speak Hebrew.

In fact, that’s the part that he probably enjoys almost as much as the teaching element. “When I can encourage a person to speak more, his self-confidence grows, he feels generally better about himself, then I know he’ll continue to speak Hebrew and improve his skills in every way, whether he’s part of Ulpan Aviv or not.”

Gil has learned to hone his listening skills as well as his teaching skills. One of the advantages of teaching one-on-one is that a “personal relationship is developed between the student and the teacher.” As a result, the student feels more relaxed, and begins to speak more.

Each teacher-student pair develops a curriculum that meets the student’s specific needs. Course materials are all original, and are developed, again, based on the individual needs of the students.

Elayne, who after living in Israel for 26 years enrolled at Ulpan Aviv so that she could improve her Hebrew skills was impressed from the outset with Gil. “I have to improve my vocabulary in my field (she’s planning on opening a new business). He said he was going to build a program specifically for my needs and in my field, and he did. Now, I’m speaking most of the time, which is exactly what I need.”

At Ulpan Aviv, studies are paced according to the individual’s ability with an emphasis on speaking. The student spends hours speaking, writing, reading and practicing Hebrew including the latest slang words, idiomatic expressions, building vocabulary, understanding conjugations and grammar, and pronunciation (so you’re speaking with a more Israeli accent.) Students are exposed to ‘make believe’ situations and learn not only how to cope in Hebrew, but also learn what the ‘sub-text’ of a verbal exchange may be.

Students range in age from elementary school children through seniors. But, regardless of one’s age, at the end of the day, everyone is speaking Hebrew following Ulpan Aviv’s standard 10-day course.

Making Ivrit Relevant

Ask Anton Goodman, Director of the Leadership Institute of World Bnei Akiva, why they chose Ulpan Aviv to teach Hebrew to 100+ of their participants, and he sums it up in one word: relevance.

“For some time, we’ve been looking for an innovative approach to teach our program participants Hebrew. We found that the Hebrew taught in other Ulpanim was outdated. Our participants weren’t connecting with the people on the street. Ulpan Aviv offered the best program.”

Not only did they provide teachers who spoke the languages of the different participants — from Italian to English but they also designed programs specifically for the Leadership Institute’s needs. For example, prior to Institute participants commencing their work with Ethiopian immigrants, Ulpan Aviv created a series of programs in Hebrew incorporating Eidan Reichal songs and the story of the Ethiopian Aliyah.

“That’s what makes the difference,” claims Anton. “Ulpan Aviv is able to integrate Ivrit in the broader educational content.”

The Jewish Agency’s Masa program, Tafnit and IBC have also engaged Ulpan Aviv to work with their participants who are in Israel for extended programs.

Exporting Ulpan Aviv

Jonathan Sacredoti, 29 years old, was one of the participants in the first overseas course, which took place in London. Ulpan Aviv prepared materials for the group and sent over teachers. “I always wanted to learn Hebrew. I know how to read, but don’t understand. I come to Israel often to visit family and friends.” He looked at a number of programs, but felt that the group approach was just not for him. “You are limited in what you can learn in weekly meetings with 20 other people.”

What he liked most about Ulpan Aviv however, was the balance between grammar (crucial to helping you sound ‘intelligent’ when speaking Hebrew) and conversation. “In most other classes they expect you to concentrate on one or the other, but not Ulpan Aviv.”

Louise, also a London resident, decided she wanted to learn Hebrew so she could better converse with Israelis during her frequent visits. “Ulpan Aviv designed the 10-day course purely for what I wanted. I’m speaking Hebrew, enjoying it, and looking forward to taking another course.”

Of the original participants in the 10 day course in London, 50% have signed up for a follow-up course to take place online or in Israel.

On the Drawing Board

The success Ulpan Aviv enjoyed in London has encouraged them to offer a course in Washington, D.C. And, Gil and Osnat have created a new program for smaller gatherings in people’s homes, where a minimum number of participants with common objectives can meet to learn Modern Hebrew together.

“Everyone has room to improve,” Elyane says. “My kids will be the first to report that my Hebrew definitely improved. They were surprised that not only did I understand their ‘slang’, but I was using it myself.”

“To say that my Hebrew has improved,” Reuven reports, “well that is not the word. Now, I can now hold my own in a conversation. In fact, I have people who are calling me today and saying, ‘hey, I hear you are speaking Hebrew.”

Would they recommend Ulpan Aviv? “They have started a great service” according to Elayne. Reuven, who feels that “the whole idea of how Ulpanim are structured needs to be rethought,” is already signing of for a second course at Ulpan Aviv.

The original concept of traditional Ulpanim was that “new immigrants, arriving from all parts of the world with varying languages and cultures could develop a shared sense of identity and statehood.” They may have a shared a sense of identity, but only 40% are actually able to speak Hebrew well. Graduates of Ulpan Aviv, on the other hand, thanks to the Ulpan’s innovative, modern learning program, are speaking Hebrew fluently, entering the work force with enhanced skills and still enjoying a shared sense of identity.

www.ulpanaviv.com

Ulpan aviv is being built by NET Interactive

www.net-im.co.il

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GOD AGAINST US: ALIEN SPACEMAN JESUS, THE THE WORLD TRADE CENTER ATTACK AND MORE

Alvin Miller

(1986)

My second, newest article: http://www.angelfire.com/crazy/spaceman/inaugural.html

At my site: http://www.angelfire.com/crazy/spaceman/ TABLE OF CONTENTS

PREFACE

CHAPTER ONE: A PLAUSIBLE TIMETABLE

CHAPTER TWO: A FIRST LOOK AT NORMAN O. BROWN

CHAPTER THREE: THE MEDIA MESSIAH, OR LOOKING FOR JESUS ON

TV

CHAPTER FOUR: THE MESSIAH RETURNS

APPENDIX: THE SECRET RAPTURE

BIBLIOGRAPHY

FILM LIST BY DATE

FILM LIST

FILM SERIALS

PREFACE

What do you call a crazy spaceman? – - An Astronut.

What follows is a nearly word for word online version of my ©1986 booklet WEIRD ESCHATOLOGY: AN ALTERNATIVE VIEW OF THE SECOND COMING (ISBN 0-9616435-0-1; Library of Congress Call Number BT823.M55 1986). By the time you finish this, you may conclude that this particular peculiar interpretation of the Book of Revelation should be relegated to the teachings of self-appointed cranks, crackpots, prophets of doom and various other assorted fanatics. But perhaps, even so, your own view may be clarified when you read this. The first chapter deals with theology and may be slightly dull, but fasten your seatbelt, as I will get more and more weird ahead (in terms of any interpretation you have seen before). Note that I make use of mostly unobtainable texts and obscure films. Lack of access to these sources should not impede your understanding of what follows. Also, to emphasize the ostensibly momentous issues I am dealing with here, I capitalize the subject phrases I discuss.

CHAPTER ONE

A PLAUSIBLE TIMETABLE

Are you a Christian? Do you believe in the Second Coming at some future date? Is it legitimate to construct timetables for these future events?

Rhetorical questions such as these right off the bat may well put you off. A major difficulty is that no consensus as to when and in what sequence these predicted events must take place. This topic has always been a particular source of schism and polemic. I will be proposing specific dates as numerous have in each generation before me. And as many have been before me, I can be refuted by the mere passage of time.

The majority view espoused by most evangelicals is pretribulational premillennalism, which I only partially agree with. I will point out that part of this view is in fact based on a historical novelty that only traces back to the nineteenth century. What I mean here is that in terms of the glacially slow movement of theology (remember that the canon was finalized some two thousand years ago), the majority view is a relatively recent innovation.

I prefer a distinctly minority position, which would be called multiple-rapture postmillennialism. The postmillennial position holds that many of the predictions made in the New Testament, including those of the Olivet Discourse (Matt. 24, Mk 13, Luke 21), were accomplished in the early Christian era, and their past fulfillment limit’s the future events to be expected. There exists one school, represented by, for example, Max King and Timothy James, which holds that each and every prophecy of the entire New Testament was accomplished during the early Church age. However, I feel this view neglects proper consideration of the Book of Revelation.

Postmillennialism is also sometimes referred to as preterism, which implies that the text is allowed to speak without exegesis. Thus, when Jesus repeatedly predicts the Kingdom within a generation, I do not write off the statement as a mistake or excess of enthusiasm. Instead, I draw up a timetable that shows the Kingdom beginning a generation after the Crucifixion. Then, when John of Patmos says the Millennium starts at this date of the beginning of the Kingdom, I duly go to my chart (at the end of this chapter) and set the Thousand Year Clock ticking. There was in fact a specific date a generation after the Crucifixion – the pivotal date of A.D. 70. This was the historical date of the Fall of Jerusalem, which is not a particularly prominent date in more mainstream discussions. This is the date of the First Resurrection in the terminology of John of Patmos that begins the Millennium.

What happened in A.D. 70? After a lengthy siege by the Roman legions, Jerusalem was ransacked and leveled. To the secular eye, as detailed by Josephus in THE JEWISH WAR in gory detail, the scene was one of mass destruction in which not even the Temple was spared. But to the spiritual eye, as Russell’s PAROUSIA demonstrated more than a century ago, these events were the fulfillment of the Olivet Discourse and the return of Jesus and His conquering armies in the clouds to inaugurate the spiritual reign with the saints and martyrs. Other sources listed in the bibliography including Chilton’s PARADISE RESTORED espouse this view. Chilton nominated Jerusalem as the Whore of Babylon and Rome as the Beast. (Note added 2006: In my 1986 Timetable I followed Chilton. I have since reversed my opinion. I now see Rome as the Whore and Jerusalem as the Beast.)

I need to stop for a moment to consider the question of the dating of the Book of Revelation. The presently accepted date for the appearance of the Book of Revelation is A.D. 95. If this is the correct date, the fulfillment of the predictions made so far would be merely a matter of hindsight. I recommend John A. T. Robinson’s examination of this question in REDATING THE NEW TESTAMENT. Robinson cites extensive internal and external evidence for moving the date of the Book of Revelation back to the A.D. 70 timeframe. Further, he traces the standard A.D. 95 view back to a single source. This source is a statement by Irenaeus that the Apocalypse first appeared “toward the end of Domitian’s reign.” This statement is ambiguous and may even be merely mistaken. Other sources listed in the bibliography (including Chilton and James) accept an earlier date.

The Book of Revelation represents a significant amplification of the preceding Gospels and Epistles. Here the concept of the Millennium is introduced for the first and only time. The timetable presented by John of Patmos extends forward to the future Judgment Day and the establishment of the New Jerusalem, thereby completing the New Testament Canon.

Turning to the time period of the Millennium, lasting approximately from A.D. 70 to A.D. 1070, the starting point was the spiritual event, the Parousia, as detailed by Russell and Chilton. But secular historians looking back at this time period as a whole have labeled it the Dark Ages. More recently this verdict has been tempered by the demonstration of the development and technical progress that occurred in the Middle and Far East during these years. But it does remain true that for Western Civilization, primarily Western Europe for these years, these were times of unprecedented barbarism and ignorance. During these times the blood of countless martyrs was spilled in belatedly laying down the Roman Empire and establishing the Church. Violence was the order of the day and sugarcoating or rose-colored glasses are unnecessary. The First Resurrection was an event of mass destruction and the Kingdom or Millennium was an era of barbarism. In other words, it is not an accident or coincidence that the fulfillment of the prophecies was apocalyptic. Instead, there is an important principle to remember here, since I will point out that Judgment Day will also be mass destruction and the New Jerusalem to follow will appear to secular eyes again be relative barbarism. I will take up these thoughts again in later chapters.

Why didn’t Judgment Day begin about A.D.1070 with the end of the Millennium? Historically, many of the people living then did expect to see the Messiah return. I answer instead that this was the date when Satan was unbound for his season. Here I part company with many of the sources listed in the bibliography. They prefer to see the Millennium as an indeterminate period extending potentially thousands of years with Satan loosed for his season only shortly prior to the Second Coming. They see the Church still in the Millennial period expanding and consolidating its gains to ultimately convert the entire world immediately prior to the Advent. On the contrary, I hold that John of Patmos really meant a time period of approximately one thousand years, and that Satan has been at work sowing his evil. I admit that the season has now lasted nearly a thousand years in its own right. One consolation is that this extended period is finally about to come to a close. Satan has been quite busy from my point of view during the last centuries. Examples of his infamous work would be such events as the Renaissance, the Reformation, the Counter-Reformation, the Inquisition, the Enlightenment, the Industrial Revolution on down to the contemporary horrific mass movements. I could be accused of being a feudalist or an obscurantist here. However, I do not look back to the Kingdom so much as forward to the approaching New Jerusalem. At this point in time I feel we are reaching the low point of the curve descending to Hell, immediately prior to the Messiah’s return.

Thus, I teach hellfire and damnation, as do most of the right wing evangelists who hold the premillennial view. But, as I have said, the postmillennialists of the bibliography, who are also uniformly conservative for the most part, place much less emphasis on this aspect.

I am also in agreement with the premillennialists with respect to the Rapture. Historically, for eighteen centuries the Rapture was taken as essentially simultaneous with the Advent. This is detailed by, among others, MacPherson in THE GREAT RAPTURE HOAX and Kimball in THE RAPTURE: A QUESTION OF TIMING. MacPherson demonstrates that the nineteenth century so-called Scotch seer Margaret MacDonald in 1830 introduced the pretribulational Rapture – a temporal separation of a Secret Rapture from the Second Coming. This introduction was a theological novelty or innovation. MacPherson traces the concept from its introduction through the nineteenth century figures Darby and Scofield to the mainstream electronic evangelists of today. I have said that I accept the multiple-Rapture view, which is a variation of the pretribulational Rapture. I agree, based on the work of my sources, that this view had its origins only in the nineteenth century. I will indicate why I hold that view in the last part of Chapter Three.

I should note that because I take a preterist perspective, I place less emphasis on seeing the events that occurred with the First Resurrection exactly duplicated on Judgment Day. For example, Nero was clearly the Antichrist for A.D. 70, but I don’t necessarily expect to see a new Antichrist prior to the Second Coming. If forced to, one could select from many twentieth century candidates for this post. Similarly, I don’t expect to see the coming events occurring at the actual Jerusalem this time. I predict in Chapter Four they will more likely begin in one of the advanced Western nations.

Beginning with the next chapter, I will be using apparently incongruous sources, such as left wing sources from the sixties. I will delve into films and the media in general. These sources I will bring up are relevant to the issues of this chapter. So far I have outlined a plausible but not mainstream view of Christian eschatology. From this point forward, as promised, expect the view presented to be ‘weird‘.

CHAPTER TWO

A FIRST LOOK AT NORMAN O. BROWN

It is a tale

Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury

Signifying nothing.

-Shakespeare

There is a good possibility you have never heard of Norman O. Brown or come across any of his writings. His books are now a generation old and partly out of print. Perhaps certain of the issues he raised have become moot with the passage of time.

I think when his books originally came out Brown was taken as merely a sexual radical. I say merely here in the sense that Brown would not be under discussion if I felt that was solely what he was about. A superficial reading of his cryptic, aphoristic style indeed does give this impression. However, the actual subject of two of his books, LOVE’S BODY (1966) and CLOSING TIME (1973) was religion. Of the two books, CLOSING TIME is currently out of print but necessary for a complete picture. With these two books Brown actually solved the mysteries of religion. Am I here claiming that if you comprehend these books you will have all your questions answered on religion? Yes, that is indeed what I am claiming. Brown did get all the way to the inner sanctum. If you are able to solve Brown’s puzzles, you will simultaneously solve the mysteries of religion. I say this fully aware that Brown’s erudition makes this a monumental task.

If I have piqued your curiosity, and you decide to take a look at Brown, the best procedure might be to look at some other sources as a preliminary. It’s all there in Brown in plain English, you understand, but you may have more success by circling in from the periphery. One good out of print source from the same time period is Eric Gutkind’s THE BODY OF GOD: FIRST STEPS TOWARD AN ANTI-THEOLOGY. This book is also written in an aphoristic style. Comparing the title of this book with LOVE’S BODY will give you a clue to start you on the road to solving Brown. Looking from the philosophical side, Michael Harrington’s THE POLITICS AT GOD’S FUNERAL astutely asks all the right questions. The best book ever written on Jesus is Constantin Brunner’s OUR CHRIST: THE REVOLT OF THE MYSTICAL GENIUS (1921). Here’s an interesting sentence from the book: “There he hung, the blasphemer of God and slander of the most noble men, the poor malicious fool, the incorrigble wretch, the whoreson and whore monger, the swindler, the liar, the secucer.” The so-called radical Freudians, in general, such as Marcuse, Reich and Roheim in addition to Brown, are pertinent.

There isn’t space for an exegesis of Brown. Instead I’ll outline a central idea – the importance of the Primal Scene. For the uninitiated, the Primal Scene is what Dad and Mom did in the bedroom. Now even Freud’s disciples had difficulty seeing the significance of the Oedipal Primal Scene and repeatedly attempted to revise their master. Perhaps the best way to get an inking of its significance is to set up a confrontation between the Joker (the little ‘castrated’ clown portrayed by Brown) and you. Put yourself in the following scene as a male:

You are standing on the outskirts of the big, modern city where you live as the Joker approaches.

The Joker begins, “You know, stranger, I’ve been doing a lot of traveling lately and have seen several cities, including this one. I must say I don’t like what I’ve been seeing at all. In every town the residents use elaborate locks on their doors and seen to be afraid to get outside on their own sidewalks at night. One minute they use each other’s bodies as pleasure objects, and the next they sue each other at the slightest provocation. I see noise, confusion, mayhem and worse at each turn. I can’t think of a thing that happened in Sodom that hasn’t happened here many times over. Tell me, when you first came here was the city the same as it is now?”

You reply, “More or less it was, indeed.”

The Joker says, “This town is a hard place to try to make a living in. Life is so hectic, there is such a constant rush and din, that I sometimes believe I’m really caught in a nightmare and will wake up at any moment. This is no place to try to start a family or to raise a child. There’s no place for the kids to play here. You know, although I’ve had plenty of opportunities to unzip my pants and pull out my gun here, I just haven’t felt right about it and so far decided to keep my pants zipped up. But I see by the ring on your finger that the situation here apparently didn’t deter you. You had the same opportunity, after all, to look around and see what was going on. But I see that no matter what you saw, you weren’t about to stay away. You had to have it. I admit that I am only a Fool. But I ask you – who’s the better man?”

You: (Speechless).

The Joker resumes, “ Because I care about the evil I see and you don’t particularly care, you end up with a child to carry on your line, and I don’t. I ask you, which man has the greater love?”

You finally speak, “Before I punch you out, do you have anything more to say? – Any last words?”

The Joker ignores this and pauses a moment to scan the distant skyline. He then points a finger at the tallest skyscraper, rising in the mists – a source of civic pride known to all residents (and an indisputable phallic symbol). The Joker turns and asks, “How? – that building there – Tell me how that modern Tower of Babel was constructed? No, let me answer the question. It was constructed by men who at some time or other unzipped their pants. Not that a single one of them was ever forced to you understand. It is after all a voluntary act. Now I ask you to consider for a moment with me what would have happened if not one of these same men had ever unzipped their pants at all – not even one single time. How much of what you see around here now would still be here? I’ll answer – not a bit of it would here, including the building I just pointed to. I’ve been wondering these days why we put up with the perpetual nightmares here that we go through to get these massive monuments constructed. If we could just get all the women under control, we could sit around all day and drink beer and play cards.”

You reply, “Leave it to a shiftless ne’er-do-well to –”

The Joker interrupts, “What we really need here is a King – the absolute biggest Fool we can find with the largest member. I think you may agree that I am the perfect candidate for this job, as I’m absolutely no good for anything else.”

The pair glare at each other, ready to fight.

Let me make the important point about this tale that the ‘you” of the dialogue could just as well be the Joker’s father as anyone else – not a single line of the preceding would need to be changed. (In the original tale of Oedipus meeting his father at the crossroads, the pair had been separated and there was a disguise and neither seemed to recognize the other, at least consciously.) If the ’you’ of the narrative were indeed the Joker’s father, the Joker would then literally be a son of a gun. This would also make the Joker on his mother’s side literally an S.O.B.

In the dialogue that took place at the Temptation of Christ (Matt. 4:1-11, Mk. 2:13, Luke 4:1-13), Jesus rejected Satan’s offer of the kingdoms of this world. Brown says we are indeed in Satan’s kingdom, i.e., Hell, especially in the big cities. Jesus will one day accept dominion over the earthly kingdoms, but only on Judgment Day when His enemies have been made into footstools. When He does return, He will bring the keys to Hell and to Death. This implies that a massive restructuring of present urban life – our man-made Hell – will begin at this point.

To change the subject, if you have an interest in James Joyce, you should examine the excerpts Brown has collected in CLOSING TIME. Joyce either imitates (or himself actually is) the insane. The WAKE is from start to finish nothing but the gibberings of a madman. FINNEGANS WAKE is a textual Rorschach test, by which I mean that in its voluminous pages, any phrase you are looking for before you open the book can likely be found. But all the excerpts Brown has assembled taken together conclusively demonstrate that Joyce ‘cracked’ religion, i.e., that all the answers were set down in the WAKE. In other words, Brown demonstrates that Joyce earlier pioneered the same trail in that Brown found. I don’t want to go beyond fair use and start quoting text, so I’ll stop.

CHAPTER THREE

THE MEDIA MESSIAH: LOOKING FOR JESUS ON TV

Let me start with a lengthy list:

PURPLE RAIN COLORED RAIN GREEN RAIN FAIRY RAIN INVISIBLE RAIN BLOWING THE WIND REAPING THE WHIRLWIND IDIOT WIND WEATHER WAR REICHIAN ORGONE RADAR LOVE THE CALL LONDON CALLING THE BIG BROADCAST WEIRD RADIO PLANET WAVES BLOWING THE HORN SOUNDING THE TRUMPET MIND WAR FAIRY GOLD FAIRY BLIGHT FAIRY BASEBALL FAIRY BOWLING WALLS TUMBLING DOWN BALLOON GOES UP THE LONG GOODBYE THE BIG SHOOTOUT THE LAST ROUNDUP DROPPING THE VIALS THE POWER AND THE GLORY FIRE AND BRIMSTONE THE FLOOD TWINKLING OF AN EYE THE RAPTURE THE SECRET RAPTURE MARCHING MORONS DROPPING THE BIG ONE THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL THE MACHINE STOPS THE FINAL SOLUTION THE ELEPHANT BURIAL GROUNDS THE ROAD TO HOLOCAUST TIMEBOMB TICKING OVER SODOM LAYING THE DEVIL DOWN RADIO SILENCE LIGHTS OUT SHUTTING IT DOWN TURNING IT OFF PULLING THE PLUG PUNCHING THE DELETE BUTTON THE SCREEN GOES DARK CLOSING TIME JUDGMENT DAY SIGNING OFF NIGHTFALL THE BIG SLEEP

“Whom the gods would destroy, they first drive mad” I’ll ask some questions about this list to clarify it. At first sight, looking over this by no means exhaustive list, it appears we need to get out our umbrellas (or perhaps a degree in meteorology). The first question to ask is: How many of these phrases have you ever come across before? Try to think where, if anywhere, any of these phrases can be found. After thinking it over, you might decide that some show up in literature, some may be from the Bible, but many of them come from the media.

The next question about the list would be: by grouping all these phrases together as I did, did I thus intend to imply that each phrase is identical or synonymous with each other phrase in the list? No, they are interchangeable in only a few cases, but they are interrelated. What then do the phrases have in common? My answer is that all bear a direct relationship to a single phrase:

MASS PSYCHOSIS

This particular phrase, Mass Psychosis, you are probably less likely to have come across. Mass Psychosis is the actual meaning of the Fundamentalist doctrine of the Secret Rapture.

Now I’m sure if one had the opportunity to interview rock star Prince and ask him what he meant by Purple Rain that he would not immediately reply, “a codeword for mass psychosis.” Similarly, Bob Dylan wouldn’t be inclined to say, “When I sang about Idiot Wind, I meant mass psychosis.” I would instead expect convoluted explanations involving literary metaphors, etc., if I received any reply at all.

Incidentally, I mentioned Prince deliberately since there was controversy about his ‘explicit ’ lyrics when his songs came out. I note that his critics had nothing at all to say about the other dimension of his songs I am pointing to here – Judgment Day by 1999, etc.

Here I want to stop discussion of the list and return at the end of this chapter with more comments. Let me briefly return to the general topic of the media. By media I mean all the conduits by which paid entertainment reaches us – film, radio, television, etc. Because television has such a voracious appetite, I will be using the term media and TV more or less interchangeably. Think of how TV, in order to fill each and every hour, gobbles up the output of the other media, from films to stage plays to even rock music in the form of music videos. Some of us are logging in nearly a third of our lives glued to out sets these days. As a baby boomer, I teethed on TV and took its pervasive influence for granted. But, after decades of exposure we have now had, I feel it is time we should begin a serious examination of the media. Its influence is probably considerably greater than literary sources today.

Already by the sixties we had the McLuhanesque dictum that the medium is the message. This idea is that the content is not particularly important, but rather the existence and ubiquitousness of the medium itself is the most significant fact.

Let me look at media criticism in terms of increasing level of profundity. At the lowest, most abysmal level, the media are seen as providing harmless entertainment. But the billions of dollars we dump into the media demonstrate that much more is going on. Slightly better is the extreme right wing evangelical view that TV and films are the devil’s picture book and rock music is the devil’s music. This approach has the virtue of being factually correct, but has fallen on increasingly hard times as all but the diehards have capitulated and joined in the media cacophony themselves. Massive blocks of radio broadcast time and entire cable networks are devoted to selling Jesus sandwiched in between the ads for soap and used cars.

Slightly more discriminating is the idea that TV is a boob tube and rock music is subversive trash, and exposure to one or both may permanently warp your brain. Is the ultimate objective to produce a race of mindless, godless, zombie giants (the return of the “men of renown” of Genesis as described by Brown in CLOSING TIME)?

What indeed keeps us mesmerized by the flickering images hour after hour? Why are so many of us couch potatoes – practically frozen into stone statues? What are we really watching? The answer from Norman O. Brown is that we are seeing the Oedipal Primal Scene reenacted night after night in endless repetition with slight variations. You object, “I beg your pardon. I watched a game show followed by a situation comedy last night.” What we are really doing here is paying performers to put on the only show we want to see.

Finally, at the highest level of criticism, we also simultaneously get the final verdict on the media. We are watching Jesus get crucified night after night in excruciating detail, although we may not be consciously aware of it. After decades of this, I think it is likely to catch up with us some day. In other words, the lurid violence and evil we see depicted in the media may eventually come to us in real life.

In spite of the blanket condemnation of the last paragraph, I’m going to turn around and list some movies. Ideally you should stay away. But the payoff is going to come to us all, whether or not we individually may or may not have watched. In the meantime, perhaps we can use the opportunity to study both the overt and the subtle techniques being employed.

The primary genre to keep an eye on is science fiction. As Susan Sontag said in the sixties, this is the genre of apocalypse and mass destruction. Typically, as in the prototype FRANKENSTEIN (1932), a man attempts to appropriate the prerogatives of God (technically blasphemy) and reaps madness and disaster. These are rigidly moral parables where retribution is swift and sure.

Look, for example, at Rene Clair’s THE CRAZY RAY (1923) from the infancy of the industry. The elements that were to become cliches with decades of continuous repetition were already present. A mad scientist invents a ray machine he constructs inside the Eiffel Tower that turns the inhabitants of Paris into stone statues. An aircraft initially out of range of the ray lands, and the passengers are astonished when they disembark. One worthwhile principle of criticism is to pay particular attention to the message of film titles. In this example, the title might bring to mind such questions as: “did the title mean the inventor was crazy? Or did the ray have crazy effects? Or did the ray drive people crazy, implying that to turn people to stone is to drive them mad?”

A quite similar theme is presented in THE VILLAGE OF THE DAMNED (1960) and its sequel THE CHILDREN OF THE DAMNED (1964) (what questions do these titles bring to mind?). This time a mysterious influence seals off an entire village, the perpetrators in this case being invading aliens. Here, as in THE CRAZY RAY, a geographic area is temporarily circumscribed. The females are impregnated by the aliens and subsequently bear children with glowing eyes and mysterious powers. This aspect of the film echoes the tale in the Book of Enoch of the fallen angels who descended to earth to mate with the women and to teach forbidden arts.

Let me quickly note a few relevant characteristics of paranoid schizophrenia as described by, for example, Norman O. Brown, Geza Roheim or Victor Tausk. The patient believes evil entities such as aliens from another world are secretly conspiring to do him harm. The patient may believe his enemies are employing physical equipment such as beam projectors against him. He is subject to seeing hallucinations or hearing voices attempting to guide his actions against his will. In THE NEXT VOICE YOU HEAR (1950) normal radio broadcasts are interrupted for short periods each night, and the cast seems to hear a message. This message seems to be more or less the Sermon on the Mount. Was this the voice of God? If not, what was it?

Another frequent theme in science fiction is the nomination of candidate (false) messiahs. I say false, since we are merely watching actors playing a fictional role. A real life prototype of these characters if found would not automatically thereby be a messiah. An example is THE MAN FROM PLANET X (1951), which has an alien who is trapped and needs earthly assistance.

THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL (1951) (note the title) offers another false messiah. An alien descends in a saucer, takes on the interesting name of Mr. Carpenter, is killed and resurrected three days later, etc. In the case of this film, the extensive analogies were conscious on the part of some of the production people and were taken from the novel on which the film is based.

In the BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS (1958) an alien

possesses a scientist, who then embarks on a mad quest to rule the world. It’s my all time favorite movie. He has the power to shoot airliners out of the sky with his eyes while lauging maniacally. He causes megaton exposions with no visible weapons in his scheme for world domination. He’s also a sex fiend. Ingmar Bergman’s THE MAGICIAN (1958) presents a rather dyspeptic false messiah from a traveling carnival show. The messiah of WHISTLE DOWN THE WIND (1962) (note the title) is a fugitive mistaken for Jesus when discovered in their barn. When apprehended and frisked, he stretches his arms to form a cross. THE FLIM FLAM MAN (1967) is a petty con artist living by his wits. CHARLY (1968) is mentally retarded until chemically transformed into a supermind. In THE RULING CLASS (1971), the candidate is an apparent psychopath. THE OMEGA MAN (1971), a remake of THE LAST MAN ON EARTH (1964), (note the titles) offers another ersatz messiah. In ZARDOZ (1973), the messiah figure is a barbarian.

SKY CAPTAIN AND THE WORLD OF TOMORROW (2004) has as the villan a man in his grave named German Toden Kopf (Death’s Head). He has arranged to have a new Noah’s ark built. As so often, the villan is the secret hero, because here Sky Captain actually destroys the Ark! HOLOCAUST 2000 (1978) (note the prediction in the title) presents the spectacle of Kirk Douglas wildly running up and down the Middle Eastern oilfields proclaiming the Ten Horns, etc. from the Book of Revelation. The messiah of THE LAST WAVE (1979) is an aboriginal witch doctor. In BEING THERE (1979), a simple-minded gardener who can barely tie his bootlaces and happens to be named Mr. Gardiner impresses the President as a sage. At the end of the film he walks on water since no one has told him this is impossible. A not very bright academic in SIMON (1979) is prevailed upon to impersonate a spaceman. After a period of rigorous mental brainwashing and physical conditioning, Simon comes to believe that he actually is an alien. He uses equipment that interrupts regular television broadcasts when he periodically wants to deliver messages. Similarly, in RIDERS OF THE STORM (1986), riders on a bomber interrupt TV broadcasts.

Woody Allen’s ZELIG (1984) features a schizophrenic chameleon who supposedly hobnobbed with the leading political figures of the thirties. In the PURPLE ROSE OF CAIRO (1985), also by Woody Allen, a larger than life hero steps out of the screen in a movie theater and into the squalid life of a New Jersey housewife. CREATOR (1985) has a loony college professor who is attempting to resurrect his dead wife. The students he recruits for the project are lectured on the Big Picture.

Numerous other films with similar themes are listed in the bibliography, but, due to space limitations, I won’t give further examples here. Men play god in the movies, but do they in real life? I point to such research as genetic engineering, or the ‘star wars’ project (laser weapons, beam projectors, etc.) These devices were first predicted in science fiction, but always accompanied by warnings we conveniently ignored that to develop them would be to court disaster. Further, I will shortly point out that while these films depict physical devices, such actual equipment is unnecessary to produce the effects depicted.

As for the entertainment industry, we pour multiple billions into it year in and year out. For what we pay we get back entertainment, but additionally, we also get back social engineering that we didn’t necessarily ask for. I am by no means suggesting a conscious conspiracy or deliberate plot by Hollywood. The fundamental problem is again expressed by McLuhan – the medium is the message. In other words, inherent in the nature of the images produced by the media is a latent potential for subversion and ultimately destruction.

From this point to the end of the chapter, I will again take up the list with which I began this chapter. Upon completing the listing, I said each term was related to the term Mass Psychosis. I now claim we have already had several actual episodes. The first, in late August 1973, lasted nearly two weeks. It occurred during the Watergate period and was done primarily by the ‘hippies’. The April 1983 event occurred during the time of the American embassy bombing in Lebanon. The October 1983 event occurred during the time of the Marine barracks bombing in Lebanon. The most recent event was the broadcast made while the Tower of Babel 9-11 attack (World Trade Center) was simultaneously taking place. These broadcasts lasted only a day or so each and were done by a remnant handful of people.

What is the Invisible Rain like when it is falling? A person walking down the street may stop for a second, look around quizzically (what the #$*!), perhaps sniff the air, and then continue on. You’ve lived through it – you tell me what it’s like.

A few comments to wrap up the chapter. These events should not be referred to as a Flood, because of God’s promise in Genesis that there would be no more Flood. The New Testament imagery is always fire. I hold Margaret MacDonald’s Secret Rapture innovation of the nineteenth century correct, since we now have hindsight on these (multiple) events. There may or may not be more before the Messiah returns. After all, no one can predict the weather.

CHAPTER FOUR

THE MESSIAH RETURNS

I’ll begin with another list:

THE SPACE COWBOY THE SKY MARSHAL OF THE UNIVERSE SKY KING KING OF THE ROCKET MEN STARMAN THE LOST PLANET AIRMAN THE MAN FROM INNER SPACE THE MORON FROM OUTER SPACE THE DIVINE IDIOT THE MAN WITH A THOUSAND FACES THE MIRROR MAN THE INVISIBLE MAN THE THIN MAN THE OMEGA MAN THE MYSTERY MAN THE MAN WITH THE POWER THE MAN WITH THE POISON MIND THE MEDICINE MAN THE RAINMAKER THE FERTILITY KING WILD-EYED CHAMELEON THE JOKER THE DEMOLITION MAN BIG BROTHER

Let me ask a few rhetorical questions. Are we perhaps involved in a real life version of the children’s game King of the Mountain in order to pick out the Messiah? Consider the paranoid schizophrenic with delusions of grandeur or possibly what is diagnosed as a messianic complex. What has this to do with the Messiah? Am I suggesting the Messiah will be merely a madman? Let me define a fairy or Peter Pan. A fairy is chronologically and physiologically an adult but has refused to assume an adult identity (ego) and has refused to take on adult responsibility. A fairy more or less never outgrows the omniscience, omnipotence and sense of wonder possessed by the infant, and inhabits fantasy mental worlds in preference to the real world. Again, I ask, what has this to do with the Messiah?

I took a brief look in the preceding chapter at some of what I felt were candidate messiahs being put forward by the movie industry. I wonder if we might be getting practice for recognizing the actual Messiah when He returns. I feel such practice may well be a good idea, since; for one thing, the Messiah won’t be riding the White Horse this time (that was done in A.D. 70). Neither do I expect to see a flying saucer descending from the skies to a world capital.

I suspect it will be an Incarnation in the manner that occurred at Bethlehem. At that time, only the Wise Men and a handful of others could discern the Messiah. One dictionary definition of blasphemy is for a mortal to name himself a god. I feel there could well be an early period when the Chosen One is accused as a blasphemer or the Antichrist. A considerable period of time may elapse before He is acclaimed Lord of lords and King of kings.

At any rate, once the Messiah is actually recognized, it will then become a situation of “when the saints go marching in”. In whichever country He first appears, the Messiah and a motley crew of followers will walk into the capital city and take power. You say you want to be in that number? I suggest you think carefully about it. To the secular eye this will be a Fool’s Parade or Goon Squad made up of Snake People (Marching Morons) – the actual ‘meek’ who will then inherit the earth. I repeat – do you want to be in that number?

How, you may object, will a mere handful of such people be able to take over a major capital city? The context is important here. We are dealing at this point in time with a nation under siege internally and externally, soon to fall. Numerous other portentous dire events will be occurring simultaneously that will dilute the significance of the central event. The World Trade Center attack, 9-11, was just the inaugural event of a coming series of catastrophes. We are on an accelerating descending slope. God is against us now for our Godless Wicked ways. This will be confirmed by the disasters coming ahead predicted here.

Initially the Messiah will assume actual secular political power in order to obtain the objective of reinstating theocracy – an archaic form of government long abandoned and forgotten by Western nations. Looking again with secular eyes, whether considered from the political left or from the political right, the government will be a de facto fascist government – no matter what label is ostensibly applied to it. To provide an example of the type of events that will be taking place, if, and I cannot overemphasize the hypothetical, if this occurs in Washington, DC, the Constitution and the Bill of Rights will be abolished and both Houses of Congress dissolved. I find this idea unpalatable, and I feel none of the sources I have mentioned would find this palatable, nor would you. I do not believe these events will occur in the actual Jerusalem, but, as I have indicated, one of the major Western capitals, which will then become a platform for world domination.

W. Reich in the forties prior to even the advent of national TV took a look at popular culture in THE MURDER OF CHRIST. He was acutely aware of the possibility of fascism, having had direct experience with the mass movements of the twentieth century of both the left and the right. What would be his verdict now, some sixty years later? Many science fiction films have dramatized a fascist takeover. Are they a prototype for future real events?

The evolutionary stages the government will undergo can be expressed in the Marxist schemata. The first phase corresponds to the dictatorship of the proletariat (rule by the meek). Then begins the transition period to the withering away of the state and the classless society or New Jerusalem. Theologians have previously published outlines of the analogies between Marxist mythology and Christian eschatology. And the return of the Messiah will actually fulfill Marx’s predictions, as well as those of John of Patmos simultaneously. During the transition period, it will be a matter of being forced to do without various items we now take for granted. The entire entertainment industry will be dispensed with – television broadcasts, movies, rock music, etc. Much of the high technology of the West will be abandoned. We will cease constructing aircraft, rockets and probably even automobiles (do only angels have wings?) This will be accomplished with only a minimum of objection because the Messiah will rule with a Rod of Iron as the Book of Revelation predicts. He will be a combination Joe Stalin, Jim Jones, Adolph Hitler and Ayatollah Khomeni rolled into one. Amos in the Old Testament correctly prophecied the gnashing of teeth and tribulation that would come with the Day of the Lord.

Is Western Civilization about to officially end? Are we and our descendants to become almost exclusively concerned with physical survival, staying alive? Don’t go outside to watch the skies for the Advent. Merely stay tuned to your TV set and start paying more attention. Have I seen one too many science fiction movies? Or is the show you never expected to see ABOUT TO BEGIN?!APPENDIX

Brief excerpts from Margaret MacDonald’s 1830 Secret Rapture prophecy:

It was first the awful state of the land that was pressed upon me. I saw the blindness and infatuation of the people to be very great. I felt the cry of Liberty to be just the hiss of the serpent to drown them in perdition. It was just ‘no God’, —-

I saw the people of God in an awfully dangerous situation, surrounded by nets and entanglements, about to be tried, and many about to be deceived and fall. Now will THE WICKED be revealed, with all power and signs and lying wonders, so that if it were possible the very elect will be deceived.

PARTIAL BIBLIOGRAPHY

Chapter One.

The following titles are examples of conservative postmillennial and amillennial views as opposed to the standard premillennial view.

Bray, John L., THE MILLENNIUM – THE BIG QUESTION?

Chilton, David, PARADISE RESTORED: A BIBLICAL THEOLOGY OF DOMINION.

Brunner, Constantin, OUR CHRIST: THE REVOLT OF THE MYSTICAL GENIUS (1921 – published 1990).

James, Timothy A. THE MESSIAH’S RETURN: DELAYED? FULFILLED? OR DOUBLE-FULFILLMENT? Jones, R Bradley, THE GREAT TRIBULATON.

Kik, J. Marcellus, AN ESCHATOLOGY OF VICTORY.

Kimball, William R., THE RAPTURE: A QUESTION OF TIMING.

King, Max, THE SPIRIT OF PROPHECY.

Lewis, Arthur H., THE DARK SIDE OF THE MILLENNIUM.

Logston, Robert, THE END-TIMES BLOODBATH. MacPherson, Dave, THE GREAT RAPTURE HOAX.

Robinson, John A. T., REDATING THE NEW TESTAMENT.

J. Stuart, THE PAROUSIA (1887).

Stevens, Ed, WHAT HAPPENED IN 70 A.D.

Terry, Milton, BIBLICAL HERMENEUTICS.

Chapters Two-Four.

Brown, Noman O., CLOSING TIME (1973).

______________, LOVE’S BODY (1966).

Campbell, Joseph and Robinson, H., A SKELETON KEY TO FINNEGANS WAKE (1944). Gutkind, Eric, THE BODY OF GOD: FIRST STEPS TOWARD AN ANTI-THEOLOGY (1966-Horizon Press).

Harrington, M. THE POLITICS AT GOD’S FUNERAL: THE SPIRITUAL CRISIS OF WESTERN CIVILIZATION (1983)

Hyde, Lewis, TRICKSTER MAKES THIS WORLD (1988).

Joyce, James, FINNEGANS WAKE (1939).

Reich, Wilhelm, THE MURDER OF CHRIST: THE EMOTIONAL PLAGUE OF MANKIND (1966). Robinson, Paul A., THE FREUDIAN LEFT: WILHELM REICH, GEZA ROHEIM, HERBERT MARCUSE (1969). Roheim, Geza, MAGIC AND SCHIZOPHRENIA (1955). ____________, ANIMISM, MAGIC AND THE DIVINE KING (1930). Sontag, Susan, “The imagination of disaster.” AGAINST INTERPRETATION AND OTHER ESSAYS (1966). Tausk, Victor, “On the origin of the ‘Influencing Machine’ in schizophrenia” (1933).

Tindall, W., A READER’S GUIDE TO FINNEGANS WAKE (1969).

Verene, D., KNOWLEDGE OF THINGS HUMAN AND DIVINE: VICO’S NEW SCIENCE AND FINNEGANS WAKE (2003).

FILM LIST BY DATE (PRIMARILY SCIENCE FICTION)

A partial list of relevant and valuable film titles. No studios are given. Especially significant films are preceeded by an *

*EVAN ALMIGHTY (2007) (sequel to BRUCE ALMIGHTY. God commands Evan to build an Ark)

THE INVISIBLE (2007) AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH (1996) CLICK (2006)

STRANGER THAN FICTION (2006)

BEWITCHED (2005)

CHICKEN LITTLE (2005) (‘The sky is falling!)

*CONSTANTINE (2005)

V FOR VENDETTA (2005) THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW (2004)

ELLA ENCHANTED (2004)

FAHRENHEIT 9/11 (2004)

THE FINAL CUT (2004) (madman must die to save others)

THE FORGOTTEN (2004)

THE LOST SKELETON OF CADAVRA (2004)

THE MACHINIST (2004)

THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST (2004)

*SKY CAPTAIN AND THE WORLD OF TOMMOROW (2004)

WHAT THE #$*! DO WE KNOW!? (2004)

*BRUCE ALMIGHTY (2003) (‘Armageddon outta here!’)

*NORTHFORK (2003) (has an Ark,a Flood and recording angels)

SPIDER (2003) (madman)

CLOCKSTOPPERS (2002) (mass psychosis)

DON’T SAY A WORD (2002)

FINAL (2002)

FRAILTY (2002)

HEARTS IN ATLANTIS (2002)

THE IMPOSTER (2002)

K-PAX (2002)

LILO AND STITCH (2002)

NO SUCH THING (2002)

THE RING (2002)

SIGNS (2002)

ZOOLANDER (2002)

A BEAUTIFUL MIND (2001)

CHICKEN RUN (2000)

END OF DAYS (1999)

GLADIATOR (1998)

THE MATRIX (1998)

*THE SIXTH SENSE (1998)

WHAT DREAMS MAY COME (1998)

MEN IN BLACK (1997)

INDEPENDENCE DAY (1996)

MARS ATTACKS! (1996)

*PLEASANTVILLE (1996)

FORREST GUMP (1994)

*STARGATE (1994)

DROP DEAD FRED (1991) THE RAPTURE (1991)

THE FISHER KING (1990)

THE HANDMAIDS TALE (1990)

LOOSE CANNONS (1990)

SPACED INVADERS (1990)

EARTH GIRLS ARE EASY (1988)

BEETLEJUICE (1988)

BIG (1988)

RAINMAN (1988)

THEY LIVE (1988)

*WINGS OF DESIRE (1988) (angels)

FIELD OF DREAMS (1987)

*MAKING MR. RIGHT (1987)

PRINCE OF DARKNESS (1987)

REAL MEN (1987)

THE BOY WHO COULD FLY (1986)

FLIGHT OF THE NAVIGATOR (1986)

RIDERS OF THE STORM (1986)

BETTER OFF DEAD (1985)

CREATOR (1985)

LIFEFORCE (1985)

*LEGEND (1985)

MORONS FROM OUTER SPACE (1985)

MASS APPEAL (1985)

MY SCIENCE PROJECT (1985)

THE PURPLE ROSE OF CAIRO (1985)

REANIMATOR (1985)

REAL GENIUS (1985)

STARMAN (1985)

WEIRD SCIENCE (1985)

BROTHER FROM ANOTHER PLANET (1984)

THE DEAD ZONE (1984)

DREAMSCAPE (1984)

GHOSTBUSTERS (1984)

THE LAST STARFIGHTER (1984)

THE LONELY GUY (1984)

THE NATURAL (1984)

NIGHT OF THE COMET (1984)

RED DAWN (1984)

REVENGE OF THE NERDS (1984)

SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES (1984)

TERMINATOR (1984)

TESTAMENT (1984)

*ZELIG (1984)

KRULL (1983)

THE MAN WITH TWO BRAINS (1983)

VIDEODROME (1983)

*ROCK AND RULE (1982)

THE SENDER (1982)

ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK (1981)

SCANNERS (1981)

*THE LATHE OF HEAVEN (1980-PBS)

ALIEN (1979)

*BEING THERE (1979)

CAPRICORN ONE (1979)

THE LAST WAVE (1979)

*SIMON (1979)

HOLOCAUST 2000 (1978)

STAR WARS (1977)

CARRIE (1976)

THE MAN WHO FELL TO EARTH (1976)

THE OMEN (1976)

A BOY AND HIS DOG (1975)

*THE DEVIL’S RAIN (1975)

THE STEPFORD WIVES (1975)

WIZARDS (1975)

FLESH GORDON (1974-X)

YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN (1974)

THE EXORCIST (1973)

THE HOLY MOUNTAIN (1973)

HIGH PLAINS DRIFTER (1973)

JESUS CHRIST, SUPERSTAR (1973)

SOYLENT GREEN (1973)

THE SPOOK WHO SAT BESIDE THE DOOR (1973) THE WICKER MAN (1973)

WESTWORLD (1973)

ZARDOZ (1973)

A CLOCKWORK ORANGE (1971)

FOOLS’ PARADE (1971)

THE LAST PICTURE SHOW (1971)

THE OMEGA MAN (1971)

*THE RULING CLASS (1971)

THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS (1971)

WILLY WONKA AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY (1971)

CAPTAIN NEMO AND THE UNDERWATER CITY (1970)

*THE MAGIC CHRISTIAN (1970)

THIS STUFF’LL KILL YA! (1970)

THE RAIN PEOPLE (1969)

CHARLY (1968)

MARS NEEDS WOMEN (1968)

NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968)

PLANET OF THE APES (1968)

THE POWER (1968)

FAHRENHEIT 451 (1967)

THE FLIM FLAM MAN (1967)

DR. GOLDFOOT AND THE GIRL BOMBS (1966)

KING OF HEARTS (1966)

DR. GOLDFOOT AND THE BIKINI MACHINE (1965)

A THOUSAND CLOWNS (1965)

*CHILDREN OF THE DAMNED (1964)

DR. STRANGELOVE: OR, HOW I LEARNED TO STOP WORRYING AND LOVE THE BOMB (1964)

THE LAST MAN ON EARTH (1964)

SEVEN DAYS IN MAY (1964)

THE GREAT ESCAPE (1963)

LORD OF THE FLIES (1963)

THE NUTTY PROFESSOR (1963)

THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE (1962)

THE MUSIC MAN (1962)

REPTILICUS (1962)

WHISTLE DOWN THE WIND (1962)

ATLANTIS, THE LOST CONTINENT (1961)

MASTER OF THE WORLD (1961)

ON THE BEACH (1960)

PSYCHO (1960)

*VILLAGE OF THE DAMNED (1960)

THE WORLD, THE FLESH AND THE DEVIL (1959)

ATTACK OF THE 50-FOOT WOMAN (1958)

*THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS (1958)

HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL (1958)

I MARRIED A MONSTER FROM OUTER SPACE (1958)

THE MAGICIAN (1958)

NOT OF THIS EARTH (1957)

THE COURT JESTER (1956)

FORBIDDEN PLANET (1956)

GIANT (1956)

GODZILLA (1956)

INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS (1956)

THIS ISLAND EARTH (1955)

GOG (1954)

INVADERS FROM MARS (1954)

IT CAME FROM OUTER SPACE (1953)

THE LOST PLANET (1953)

*MEET MR. LUCIFER (1953)

THE WAR OF THE WORLDS (1953)

MY SON JOHN (1952)

RADAR MEN FROM THE MOON (1952)

RED PLANET MARS (1952)

ZOMBIES OF THE STRATOSPHERE (1952)

CAPTAIN VIDEO, MASTER OF THE STRATOSPHERE (1951)

*THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL (1951)

THE MAN FROM PLANET X (1951)

WHEN WORLDS COLLIDE (1951)

D.O.A. (1950)

*THE NEXT VOICE YOU HEAR (1950)

ROCKETSHIP X-M (1950)

THE INSPECTOR GENERAL (1949)

KING OF THE ROCKETMEN (1949)

THE THIRD MAN (1949)

NIGHTMARE ALLEY (1947)

THE TREASURE OF THE SIERRA MADRE (1947)

THE PURPLE MONSTER STRIKES (1945)

COBRA WOMAN (1944)

THE LODGER (1944)

NONE BUT THE LONELY HEART (1944)

I WALKED WITH A ZOMBIE (1943)

DON WINSLOW OF THE NAVY (1942)

I MARRIED A WITCH (1942) THE DEVIL COMMANDS (1941)

THE MALTESE FALCON (1941)

*FLASH GORDON CONQUERS THE UNIVERSE (1940)

BUCK ROGERS (1939)

DAREDEVILS OF THE RED CIRCLE (1939)

THE PHANTOM CREEPS (1939)

*THE WIZARD OF OZ (1939)

FIGHTING DEVIL DOGS (1938)

FLASH GORDON’S TRIP TO MARS (1937)

THE MAN WHO COULD WORK MIRACLES (1937)

TIM TYLER’S LUCK (1937)

TOPPER (1937)

THE DEVIL DOLL (1936)

FLASH GORDON (1936)

THE INVISIBLE RAY (1936)

THINGS TO COME (1936)

UNDERSEA KINGDOM (1936)

THE LOST CITY (1935)

MURDER BY TELEVISION (1935)

*THE PHANTOM EMPIRE (1935)

GABRIEL OVER THE WHITE HOUSE (1933)

THE INVISIVIBLE MAN (1933)

KING KONG (1933)

FRANKENSTEIN (1932)

ISLAND OF LOST SOULS (1932)

M (1931)

BLUE ANGEL (1930)

METROPOLIS (1926)

THE LAST LAUGH (1924)

*THE CRAZY RAY (aka PARIS QUI DORT) (1923-Fr.)

THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI (1919)

FILM LIST

ALIEN (1979)

ATLANTIS, THE LOST CONTINENT (1961)

ATTACK OF THE 50-FOOT WOMAN (1958)

A BEAUTIFUL MIND (2001)

BEETLEJUICE (1988)

BEING THERE (1979)

BETTER OFF DEAD (1985)

BEWITCHED (2005)

BIG (1988)

BLUE ANGEL (1930)

A BOY AND HIS DOG (1975)

THE BOY WHO COULD FLY (1986)

THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS (1958)

BROTHER FROM ANOTHER PLANET (1984)

BRUCE ALMIGHTY (2003)

THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI (1919)

CAPRICORN ONE (1979)

CAPTAIN NEMO AND THE UNDERWATER CITY (1970)

CARRIE (1976)

CHARLY (1968)

CHICKEN LITTLE (2005)

CHICKEN RUN (2000)

CHILDREN OF THE DAMNED (1964)

CLICK (2006)

CLOCKSTOPPERS (2002)

A CLOCKWORK ORANGE (1971)

COBRA WOMAN (1944)

CONSTANTINE (2005)

THE COURT JESTER (1956)

THE CRAZY RAY (aka PARIS QUI DORT) (1923-Fr.)

CREATOR (1985)

THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW (2004)

THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL (1951)

THE DEAD ZONE (1984)

THE DEVIL COMMANDS (1941)

THE DEVIL DOLL (1936)

THE DEVIL’S RAIN (1975)

D.O.A. (1950)

DON’T SAY A WORD (2002)

DROP DEAD FRED (1991) DR. GOLDFOOT AND THE BIKINI MACHINE (1965)

DR. GOLDFOOT AND THE GIRL BOMBS (1966)

DR. STRANGELOVE: OR, HOW I LEARNED TO STOP WORRYING AND LOVE THE BOMB (1964)

DREAMSCAPE (1984)

EARTH GIRLS ARE EASY (1988)

ELLA ENCHANTED (2004)

END OF DAYS (1999)

ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK (1981)

EVAN ALMIGHTY (2007)

THE EXORCIST (1973)

FAHRENHEIT 451 (1967)

FAHRENHEIT 9/11 (2004)

FIELD OF DREAMS (1987)

FINAL (2002)

THE FINAL CUT (2004)

THE FISHER KING (1990)

FLESH GORDON (1974-X)

FLIGHT OF THE NAVIGATOR (1986)

THE FLIM FLAM MAN (1967)

FOOLS’ PARADE (1971)

FORBIDDEN PLANET (1956)

THE FORGOTTEN (2004)

FORREST GUMP (1994)

FRAILTY (2002)

FRANKENSTEIN (1932)

GABRIEL OVER THE WHITE HOUSE (1933)

GHOSTBUSTERS (1984)

GIANT (1956)

GLADIATOR (1998)

GODZILLA (1956)

GOG (1954)

THE GREAT ESCAPE (1963)

THE HANDMAID’S TALE (1990)

HEARTS IN ATLANTIS (2002)

HIGH PLAINS DRIFTER (1973)

HOLOCAUST 2000 (1978)

THE HOLY MOUNTAIN (1973)

HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL (1958)

I MARRIED A WITCH (1942) I MARRIED A MONSTER FROM OUTER SPACE (1958)

I WALKED WITH A ZOMBIE (1943)

THE IMPOSTER (2002)

AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH (2006) INDEPENDENCE DAY (1996)

THE INSPECTOR GENERAL (1949)

INVADERS FROM MARS (1953)

INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS (1956)

THE INVISIBLE (2007) THE INVISIBLE MAN (1933)

THE INVISIBLE RAY (1936)

ISLAND OF LOST SOULS (1932)

IT CAME FROM OUTER SPACE (1953)

JESUS CHRIST, SUPERSTAR (1973)

KING KONG (1933)

KING OF HEARTS (1966)

K-PAX (2002)

KRULL (1983)

THE LAST LAUGH (1924)

THE LAST MAN ON EARTH (1964)

THE LAST PICTURE SHOW (1971)

THE LAST STARFIGHTER (1984)

THE LAST WAVE (1979)

THE LATHE OF HEAVEN (1980-PBS)

LEGEND (1985)

LIFEFORCE (1985)

LILO AND STITCH (2002)

THE LODGER (1944)

THE LONELY GUY (1984)

LOOSE CANNONS (1990)

LORD OF THE FLIES (1963)

THE LOST SKELETON OF CADAVRA (2004)

M (1931)

THE MACHINIST (2004)

THE MAGIC CHRISTIAN (1970)

THE MAGICIAN (1958)

MAKING MR. RIGHT (1987)

THE MALTESE FALCON (1941)

THE MAN FROM PLANET X (1951)

THE MAN WITH TWO BRAINS (1983)

THE MAN WHO COULD WORK MIRACLES (1937)

THE MAN WHO FELL TO EARTH (1976)

THE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE (1962)

MARS ATTACKS (1996)

MARS NEEDS WOMEN (1968)

MASS APPEAL (1985)

MASTER OF THE WORLD (1961)

THE MATRIX (1998)

MEN IN BLACK (1997)

MEET MR. LUCIFER (1953)

METROPOLIS (1926)

MORONS FROM OUTER SPACE (1985)

MURDER BY TELEVISION (1935)

THE MUSIC MAN (1962)

MY SON JOHN (1952)

MY SCIENCE PROJECT (1985)

THE NATURAL (1984)

THE NEXT VOICE YOU HEAR (1950)

NIGHT OF THE COMET (1984)

NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968)

NIGHTMARE ALLEY (1947)

NO SUCH THING (2002)

NONE BUT THE LONELY HEART (1944)

NORTHFORK (2003)

NOT OF THIS EARTH (1957)

THE NUTTY PROFESSOR (1963)

THE OMEGA MAN (1971)

THE OMEN (1976)

More English Kids Songs Articles

Germans love speed (Can you say BMW?) Speed is also deeply ingrained in American culture. Between commuting, emails, microwavable everything, it’s natural we want results and we want them now. How about learning German in just over a week? In the essence of these fast times, here are ten fun ways to learn to speak German uber fast. Was fällt dir denn eigentlich ein? (What’s the big idea?)

1. Go on Vacation

If you’ve always wanted to visit your great-grandfather’s hometown in Germany, there’s not a better time than today. The fastest way to speak German is to travel to Germany and submerge yourself in the language. Not only will you see historic architecture and beautiful countryside, but you’ll also perfect your essential German.

2. Take a Walk

Find German-speaking people in your neighborhood. In most large cities there are culture institutes with language exchange programs. Join a German conversation group, often sponsored by community outreach and heritage societies. . “Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club — the community of speakers of that language,” says Frank Smith, famed reporter, editor and the author of “The Book of Learning and Forgetting.”

3. Make it a Blockbuster Night

Watching a foreign film is another great way to learn German. Amazon suggests, “The Lives of Others”, “Run Lola Run,” and “The Pianist” as a few of the top internationally successful German flicks. You’ll hear German spoken fluently and learn to train your ear. Try to avoid subtitles or dubbing which will distract from the experience. (But you might turn them on after just to see how close you guessed at that 13-syllable word).

4. Become a Bookworm

Checking out German novels, travel guides and books that describe German are excellent resources to enrich the learning process. Parallel-text versions of (German and English side by side) of classics like “Socialism: Utopian and Scientific (Preface by: Karl Marx) by Frederick Engels, “The Eighteenth Brumair of Luis Bonaparte,” by Karl Marx, and “Dream Psychology: Psychoanalysis for Beginners,” By Sigmund Freud. It’s one thing to make a reference to Freud, but another thing to impress people by telling them you actually read the original text in German.

5. Turn on your Radio and TV

One of the key skills in learning a new language is how the mind comprehends the spoken word. Nowadays, many cable companies broadcast German programming. “When you know another language; you suddenly realize there is a multitude of worlds. You can become a member of EVERY club,” says Smith. In addition there are many German radio stations that can be accessed via the Internet such as radio (http://home.comcast.net/~dkalischer/WebRadio/GermanRadio.htm) or nab a learning cd, like this audio program (http://www.pimsleurapproach.com/learn-german.asp). An immersive audio experience can’t be beat for learning quickly.

6. Jam Out to German

Nab some great German tunes and take a look at the notes found on the inside cover. (Kraftwerk anyone?). These handy liner notes often have the song lyrics printed inside and are a great resource to expanding your German vocabulary. Listen to the tunes and skim the lyrics. Soon enough those catchy songs will stick to your brain and you’ll be belting out German with a native accent.

7. Play to Win

Studying a foreign language doesn’t have to be boring. Find your favorite games in German. You’ll quickly pick up on phrases and new vocabulary and have fun while doing it. This is a win-win situation. Playing your favorite games and learning? Who’d a thunk it? Oh and if you’re feeling especially frisky, test your German Scrabble skills. Viel Glück! (Good luck)

8. Get Creative

Put the mojo back into your language learning bag. One idea is to grab some sticky notes and write German words or phrases for everything all over your house. Deck out the living room, kitchen (Enjoy your meal! Guten Appetit!), garage, even the toilet paper in your bathroom (besides, that word will be very useful when you travel abroad) and it’s a fun way to boost your German vocabulary.

9. Express Yourself

Do you have a favorite German expression? Learn another one. Every time you learn an essential German phrase you’re expanding your word power. Soon enough, you’ll be speaking like a native. Warum ist mir das nicht eingefallen? (Why didn’t I think of that?)

10. German Class

When you’re ready, attend a class or get a tutor. The structure will help you develop a routine for quickly learning the language. Try the Pimsleur Approach (http://www.pimsleurapproach.com/learn-german.asp.com), which offers a fabulous program designed to make learning German actually fun. Forget about boring vocabulary lists and repeating pointless verbatim. Imagine simply listening and absorbing language in the same structure you learned as a child. Everything is broken down exactly the way kids learn. It’s simple, fully audio (so you can multitask) and is the easiest program to engage with the least amount of effort.

Now that you have several language learning ideas planted in that brain of yours, the next step is pick a few and run with them. Start incorporating bits of the German language and culture into your routine and soon enough you’ll be speaking like a native in no time. Learning German opens up so many opportunities. Smith sums it up perfectly; “One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.”

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The boy’s and girl’s name Kristian \k-ris-tian, kr(i)-stian\ is pronounced KRIS-t’-yun. It is of Scandinavian origin. Variant of Christian (Greek) “anointed Christian”.Other meanings of the name is the follower of Christ, or follows Christ.

Kristian has 3 variant forms: Krist, Kristan and Kristien.

Baby names that sound like Kristian are Krystian and Cristian.

Kristian is a very rare male first name and a very rare surname in the USA (source: 1990 U.S. Census). In Scandinavia it is used pretty often, as well as it is found used in Northern European countries like Germany, France and Greece.

Kristian can also be found in different variations, dependant upon which country it is used:

Kristian (Danish)

Kristian (Norwegian)

Kristian (English)

Kristian (Greek)

Kristian (Scandinavian)

There are lots of variations with the same meaning as Kristian:

Christien (French)

Cretien (French)

Christian (Greek)

Christiano (Greek)

Cretien (Greek)

Khrystiyanr (Greek)

Krischanr (Greek)

Krzysztofr (Greek)

Carsten (Latin)

Carston (Latin)

Christiann (Latin)

Cristiano (Latin)

Kerstan (Latin)

Christie (Scottish)

Christy (Scottish)

Kersten (Slavic)

Cristiano (Spanish)

Kfister (Swedish)

Krist (Swedish)

Kristar (Swedish)

Krystiyan (Ukrainian)

Crist (Welsh)

Some famous persons having Kristian as their first or middle name

Kristian Solmer Vedel (March 2, 1923 – March 5, 2003) was a Danish industrial designer and part of the Scandinavian Design movement.

Kristian Hellström (July 24, 1880 – June 14, 1946) was a Swedish athlete who competed mainly in the 1500 metres.

Strachkvas (Kristián) (28 September 929 or 935, Prague – 996, Prague) was a prince of Bohemia, son of Boleslav I and brother of Boleslav II, member of the P?emyslid dynasty. A clergyman, he finally became the Bishop of Prague but died during consecration.

Kristian Peter Pless (born February 9, 1981 in Odense, Denmark) is a professional male tennis player from Denmark.

Kristian Birkeland (December 13, 1867 – June 15, 1917) was born in Christiania (Oslo today) and wrote his first scientific paper at the age of 18. He organized several expeditions to Norway’s high-latitude regions where he established a network of observatories under the auroral regions to collect magnetic field data. The results of the Norwegian Polar Expedition conducted from 1899 to 1900 contained the first determination of the global pattern of electric currents in the polar region from ground magnetic field measurements. The discovery of X-rays inspired Birkeland to develop vacuum chambers to study the influence of magnets on cathode rays. An example of one of his experiments is depicted on the left front of the bank note. It shows a magnetized terrella, simulating the Earth, suspended in an evacuated box. Birkeland noticed that an electron beam directed toward the terrella was guided toward the magnetic poles and produced rings of light around the poles and concluded that the aurora could be produced in a similar way. He developed a theory in which energetic electrons were ejected from sunspots on the solar surface, directed to the Earth, and guided to the Earth’s polar regions by the geomagnetic field where they produced the visible aurora. Birkeland was nominated for the Nobel Prize no less than seven times.

Kristian Lundin (born May 7, 1973) is a Swedish composer, music producer and songwriter.

David Kristian (born November 5, 1967) is a Canadian musician and film score composer.

Kristian Ghedina (born November 20, 1969) is an Italian former Alpine skier, currently a car racer. He was the most victorious downhill specialist ever for Italy in the Alpine skiing World Cup.

Kristian-Joy Alfonso (born September 5, 1963 in Brockton, Massachusetts) is an American soap opera actress.

Kristian Huselius (born November 10, 1978 in Österhaninge, Sweden) is a professional ice hockey player.

Lauri Kristian Relander (May 31, 1883 – February 9, 1942) was the second President of Finland (1925-1931). A prominent member of the Agrarian League, he served as a member of Parliament, and as Speaker, before his election as President.

Kristian Schmid (born in Victoria on November 28, 1974) is an Australian actor who first appeared as Todd Landers in the popular Australian soap opera Neighbours. Later he starred as Adam Newman in the 1990s remake of The Tomorrow People. While on a four year work permit in the UK he made appearances on several UK television shows, he was voted by the public to be covered in gunge and slime on Noel’s House Party, and two years later had to sit under a large nose emitting pretend ‘snot’ on kids show Gimme 5.

Kristian Hoffman is an American musician. His sister is writer Nina Kiriki Hoffman.

“Kong Kristian” (King Christian), or “Kongesangen” (The King’s Song), is the royal anthem of Denmark. Composed by Ditlev Ludvig Rogert and adopted in 1780, it is one of the oldest in the world. The lyrics first appeared in 1779, in Johannes Ewald’s historical drama, The Fishermen. It is often mixed with the civil national anthems of Denmark, “Der er et yndigt land”.

The music was composed by Friedrich Kuhlau in 1828 for the play Elverhøj.

“Kong Kristian” is performed only in relations to the royal family, and normally only the first verse is played or sung. “Der er et yndigt land”, which is solely a civic national anthem, is used in every other national occasions.

Kristian Sarkies (born October 25, 1986 in Melbourne, Australia) is an Australian football (soccer) player who plays in midfield for Adelaide United as part of the A-League. Sarkies grew up in Dingley Village, a suburb in Melbourne’s South-East. Upon scoring his first A-League goal, Sarkies handsignaled Dingley’s postcode (3172) in his celebration.

Kristian Niemann is a guitarist, member of Therion, Lithium and Demonoid bands. He studied jazz at Musicians Institute. In 1996 his song “Industrial Type Thang” was featured in JSR Records’ compilation Hottest Unknown Guitarists. His style of playing mostly centers around legato and sweep picking. He is also brother of Johan Niemann.

Kristian Valen is a Norwegian comedian and popstar. He was born on the 13th October, 1974, in Stavanger in Western Norway. He started his career in radio, and has now had two TV-programs and released one CD.

Kristian Hargreaves was a fictional character on the long-running Channel 4 British television soap opera Hollyoaks.

He was played by actor Max Brown between 2002-2004.

Kristian Merrill Bush (born March 14, 1970) is a singer/songwriter. He was born in Knoxville, Tennessee. He is the guitar/mandolin player, singer and songwriter of the Grammy-nominated country music duo Sugarland. Previously, Bush was a member of the Atlanta-based musical duo Billy Pilgrim.

Ole Kristian Furuseth (born January 7, 1967) is a Norwegian former Alpine skier. He won his first World Cup victory in Furano in 1989 and his final World Cup victory in Bormio in 2000. Furuseth won a bronze medal in the slalom competition at the 1991 World Championships in Saalbach. He won a silver medal at the 1998 Olympics in Nagano. He retired as an alpine skier in 2002. Furuseth has nine World Cup victories three in Giant Slalom and six in Slalom

Kristian Schultze is one half of the German New Age band Cusco. Schultze has partnered up with Michael Holm and the two have produced numerous new age albums. However, Schultze is less prominent of the duo, as Holm has been leading figure in the band’s composition. The two met in late 1970s where they discovered they shared a similar interest in pre-colonial America.

Kristian Menchaca (May 29, 1983–June 19, 2006), Brownsville, Texas, was a United States Private First Class of the U.S. Army. He was married to Christina Menchaca of Big Spring in September 2005, before he was deployed to Iraq.

Kristian Wåhlin (born 1971 in Gothenburg, Sweden) is a Swedish musician, graphic designer, and album cover artist for many bands in the extreme metal scene worldwide.

Christian II (July 1, 1481 – January 25, 1559) was a Danish monarch and King of Denmark, Norway (1513 – 1523) and Sweden (1520 – 1521), under the Kalmar Union. Christian was born the son of King Hans of Denmark and Christina of Saxony, at Nyborg Castle in 1481 and succeeded his father as king and regent in Denmark and Norway, where he later was to be succeeded by his uncle King Frederick I of Denmark. In Sweden, he was, as a result of his conquest of Sweden and his involvement in the Stockholm Bloodbath, to be remembered as Christian the Tyrant

Related English Kids Songs Articles

American summer camps for teens play very crucial part for their ability to broaden a young person’s mind in a relaxed and informal summer environment, normally out in the countryside. So, summer fun at teen summer camps is a good concept both for teens and for youth. For teenagers, the advantages are obviously there.

Please remember that Teen Summer Camps are generally very short term courses where teens go to have fun, arts and crafts, enjoy campfire songs, and sleep in cabins or tents in the wilderness. Campers join in games, art projects, audio-video recording, songs and dance lessons.

For the most part, a summer camp will offer you many projects ranging from sporting to more academic but all are still enjoyable. Camps normally consist of all the possible topics; cyber camps, computer camps, robotics camps and sports camps. In one of the most admired camp projects offered at very many camps the campers study media and film production. A great thing at some camps is that each teenager is permitted to use the original recordings to use in their portfolios.

Each camper, after completing a summer camp program, is awarded a diploma. It offers everybody an incentive to join and do well, and can be very beneficial as part of the teenagers resume, especially for getting part-time jobs.

More to the advantages of summer camps academically, they also offer for many kids, the first option to spend time away from abode. For this reason, summer camps expanding for the children that stay over-night. Yet, some of the younger and more nervous may not wish to stay overnight. Camp managements are usually provided with the option of dormitory accommodation or on-campus residence.

A camp instructor told me recently that their students leave the camp every summer with a sense of maturity, cultural enlightenment, heightened English efficiency and lifelong friends from around the world.

It is a fact that the social mix is usually broader than the schools these children attend at term-time, and this is how they hang out with teens from different backgrounds during the camp, and maybe even dissimilar nationalities too.

This means that campers learn different coping-skills whilst building their own support manner among their fellow campers. Their friendships are deepened during the often week-long summer camp experience.

That is why it is believed that the value of summer camps is less on what they actually do while at them, but it is the skills they promote at giving support to children to better lead life as they go away that are the most useful.

Remember the important aspect in the experience of summer fun at teen summer camps. It is for children entering grades 9 through 12 to learn new skills that can prepare them for the next grade level and the next big-step which is of course their beginning at college.

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You’re probably running out of gift ideas already. Try one of those CD sets available almost anywhere. It could be of any topic of interest of your recipient.

Wondering what to give your dad on his birthday or on your nephew’s christening or maybe your close friend’s upcoming wedding? Special occasions call for special gifts. It need not be so expensive. Unique presents that show your thoughtfulness and care for the person are appreciated.

CD gift sets, for one, are fitting for any occasion and for young and old alike. They’re a valuable compilation of music and videos available in broad range. So, may it be for your best friend, youngest daughter, favorite uncle, grandmother, or fiancée, a CD set is a wonderful choice.

The following are some of the inspired CD sets that you can give:

Romantic CD Gift Sets. If you want to give a not so common gift this Valentine’s Day, surprise your sweetie with a romantic CD gift set. She will appreciate it more than chocolates or he will like it more than perfume. Classical and love songs, along with romance-inspired and passion-themed music and videos are also perfect as wedding and anniversary gifts.

Country music CD Gift Set. Country music sprang from the traditional folk music of the South. Cajun, Appalachian, Bluegrass, Nashville music, and western ballad are reviving to the soul and mind. You can also purchase CD sets of some of the well-known country music singers that include George Strait, Bob Dylan, Bob Wills, and John Denver. Your folkie father in law will never forget you if you give one to him.

Bible Stories CD Gift Set. A huge number of these sets are available in various languages including English, Spanish, Chinese, Japanese, French and even Filipino. You can choose from among many formats and various versions of the Bible such as NIV, NASB and King James Version. Commentaries are also included in many of Bible stories CDs.

This type of CD sets is a wonderful tool to teach your kids the biblical truths and remarkable history that shaped our present world. Or, to be reminded once more of how the Great flood or Creation or Christ’s resurrection happened thousand of years ago. This is recommended for every child of your life and for a child in you.

Nursery Rhyme CD Gift Set. CD sets of this kind typically come with booklets having lyrics, illustrations and resourceful activities to extend the fun and leaning all the more. Learning the songs alongside with reading the lyrics is a delightful means to develop children’s concept of print. This is great for the little one, may it be for your son for his birthday or for your niece for her kindergarten graduation.

Educational CD Gift Sets. These sets are broad and many. From a light study of plants and animals to a more detailed study of human biology and complicated computer programs, educational CD sets are amongst the most sought after. In addition, you can even find CDs for specialized fields such as cinematography, photography and cooking.

Motivational CD Gift Sets. Does your hubby getting uninterested and tired of his work and everyday routine as manager? Or is your colleague becoming anxious of her sales output for this quarter? Maybe you feel your mom need to manage herself a little more. They all simply need to be recharged and prepared to reach their goals. And watching these videos on the CD may just help them.

A motivational CD set can do wonders and energize her or him. Create in your loved ones a better management of tough situations, stronger client relationships and better motivation. Give the gift of encouragement and a motivational CD, now.

Karadi, the wise old bear, takes your kids on an exciting and magical journey of stories and rhymes. Click www.rajshri.com to watch more Karadi Tales animation videos.

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